Otome Game Review: PANDORA ~Kimi no Namae wo Boku wa Shiru~

Our heroine Isora Kanna attends class with her 2 friends Kazuto & Yuuki and after school suddenly their school gets bombed. They run into the school building when some dude comes and tells Kanna that she must come with him and then she passes out. When she wakes up she finds herself in some military base and some ossan named Maximillian tells her that she’s in some other country now because THE WORLD’S AT WAR with suicide bombers running left & right. The totalitarian army is fighting the freedom army and Sujiku, Kanna’s home town is somehow caught in between. On top of this, Kanna’s parents hid the on-switch for a weapon of mass destruction in Kanna’s genes! She’s now their ultimate weapon girl whether she likes it or not, but at least she has hot army dudes protecting her.

Kazuto Bradley – Having survived the initial blast (and gunshot apparently) Kazuto agrees to be in the military just so he can be by Kanna’s side. He’s been raised alongside with Kanna since he was young so he sees her as a childhood friend and twin sister. When Yuuki dies at the beginning I thought they forgot about him lmfao but then Kazuto’s like “I feel so guilty man…” He only realizes this when he has to go out there and blow shit up killing innocent people, which is why Yuuki died in the first place. So then in the “bonds” route he then bawws about this douchebag Travis dying in battle and says he wishes he died instead. So then in another 30 second battle Kazuto gets really injured and suddenly that’s when Kanna realizes how much she’s in love with him and then she spends a week by his side as he recovers. The things that injuries do! Once he can walk again he asks Kanna to go on a date with him…inside the control room wut. Guess all them control panels & system boards got them in the mood because some days later they then confess that they both love each other. Then he brings up childhood confession of when she said “I’ll be Kazu-chan’s waifu” as a loli 😆 Oh god what is this template. So then they have another battle and Kazuto says he’ll end this war once and for all…and then the game ended cause I picked the first option incorrectly due to following a crappy guide >_>. If you pick Shinjirarenai as the first option there will be an epilogue where Kazuto returns from battle to Kanna and they hug.

In Kazuto’s “love” route, he suggests they run away together when suddenly some shota with a knife appears attacking Kanna so Kazuto shoots & kills him. He then starts moaning about it but she tells him that it was either her or the kid! So then they get all ichaicha pretty much the rest of the route and even Ashley cheers her on. Sadly the cockblocker Maximillian finds out about their love affair and about Kazuto’s plans to stop fighting in the war. He then locks Kazuto in a special cell and labels him as a resistance prisoner. And so in that prison cell Kanna confesses that she loves Kazuto and then we get a half assed kiss CG. So then Kanna sacrifices herself for the stupid weapon and when Kazuto hears about this he rages at Maximillian who then rages back saying she did it for him. Kazuto still says that he believes Kanna is alive and that she will return to him…until he finds a letter that she left for him asking him for him to live happily in her place and that she was glad to have kissed the one she loved. Umm okay so if you’re a weak stupid heroine, you get the dude but if you’re strong enough to be willing to save the world…you die. NICE MESSAGE THERE OTOMATE. I SEE HOW IT IS. Also what the hell I love how “bonds” = happy end but “love” = bad end. How dare that hussy be all honest with her feelings of love towards her childhood friend. That hussy! She deserves to DIE! 🙄 Blah whatever…I guess some of the scenes made me (*´・ω・`*)ドキドキ  but I think it was mostly because it was Hino Satoshi’s voice and nothing else lol.

Maximillian Spavier – Maximillian’s last name looks like “Spyware” to me so for all I know I could be butchering  it but whatever let’s roll with it 😆 He’s the mr. srs bzness captain and his seiyuu is an ossan so he’s like a major miscast and it’s very offputting. He’s so hardboiled and done a lot of hard livin’ in his time that he can barely sleep at night because all the war memories just flood into his head. In the bonds route, I dunno what the hell gets into Kanna’s head but thinking she can relieve his stress, she comes into his office one day and then pokes him from behind. He’s like Σ(Д`|||ノ)ノ and in revenge is like “shut up woman, if you want to make me happy then kiss me.” HAHAHA WTF. Then he’s like “j/k” and tells her to GTFO before he changes his mind. 😄 In this route a man named Douglas informs Kanna that her father was a very important friend of his and that he designed weapons of war. Later on her father married her mother, betrayed the country, and then they both died. He then tells Kanna that she was not supposed to be born and that her existance is the cause of the war. I guess Maximillian gets the picture that she’s feeling down, and asks if she wants to take a break. Kanna asks if she can spend a day in his room イヤン☆(*´∀`)σ)))))*3゚),・´.、 and that’s where she discovers that he’s never poured tea for himself before lol. They change out of their uniforms into some casual clothes but of course for Maximillian casual means hot host club suit 萌━━━━ハァ(* ´Д`)ハァ━━━━ぇ↑↑  The tea that he pours himself apparently is gross so instead he grabs the tea that that she poured herself and drinks out of her cup. When he returns the cup to her she’s like “no its ok you drink it” and he’s like “what you’re afraid of indirect kissing” プッ(※థэథ)∵.*.∵ Omg what is this adorableness all of a sudden?? XDDD

Then he starts getting all jealous of Kazuto and he topples Kanna on her bed saying that she cries in front of her childhood friend but doesn’t tell Maximillian anything. ゚+o。ドキュ―(*゚ω゚*)―ン。o+゚ She then talks to poor Kazuto about this and he’s like “look woman I’m just a childhood friend and it’s obvious you like the other dude so stop being a dumbass and realize who you love already.” Poor Kazu-nyan, screwed over in his route and others’ routes. After that Maximillian returns from the battle and Kanna says she is glad that he’s alright even though a bunch of random people died. She asks him to pour his feelings out on her so he drags her to his room where he tells her how from age 5-15 he trained in the army and never saw his parents. When he returned, his mom went bonkers and forgot that he was her son and his dad went MIA so he’s like fuck this shit and stopped trusting people after that – afraid that he’d be betrayed again. Kanna then tells him that he shouldn’t just forget abuot his past and he pushes her against the wall asking why she won’t cry in front of him. He rages that he can’t make her act like he expects her to and he can’t read her feelings, wishing she would shed the same tears for him like she did for Kazuto.Kanna tells him that it’s because he seems like he’s about to cry more than she is, so she won’t cry in front of him. |萌|・´∀`・)ハァハァ 萌えぇぇ↑ Amazing how stupid and helpless Kanna was in Kazuto’s route but how determined and strong willed she is in Maximillian’s lol sigh. So then grandpa Henry tells Kanna that Maximillian loves her too and she needs to take charge or nothing’s gonna happen! Some moments later Maximillian bursts into her room saying that she’s gonna leave him just like everyone else and Kanna’s like “lol wut” and pets him on the head xDD. He then starts babbling about not being able to read her feelings again so she shuts him up with a hug. (´^ω^`)

She then confesses that she loves him and he admits he probably feels the same because he was insanely jealous of her and Kazuto. He hugs her back and kisses her. The next day he tells her that he wants her to live in his house away from the army base, because she’s no longer a weapon and she’s resigned from the military. The othe reason of course is when he sees her talking to other guys he goes crazy with jealousy /(^o^)\ナンテコッタイ. They move into a house together and the final CG is them sleeping together while holding hands. (*´∀`*)ノ。+゜*。 War’s not over yet but who cares! Lmfao. In Maximillian’s love route, he asks her to leave the base and live with him together but she acts like an idiot and runs to Kazuto asking him on what she should do. Kazuto of course is not happy but he says that he would prefer that knowing that her life would be in less danger away from the military base. Kanna then agrees to live with Maximillian, and knowing that she’s at home waiting for him he’s unable to focus on his work at the base. ヽ(= ´ ェ `=)ノうふふ♪ When she goes to cook him dinner he comes out of the shower only wearing a towel and comes up behind her ヾ( 〃ω〃)ッ キャーーーッ♪ She’s like “what are you doing I can’t concentrate on cooking” and he’s like “call my name baby~” LOOOL holy shit dude man he is so hot in his CGs (*´д`*)ハァハァ The next day she finds out on TV that Kazuto died and she cries and complains that Maximillian didn’t tell her about it. So then Maximillian turns into a huge douche and laughs saying Kazuto was just a toy and that the reason he brought Kanna to his house is to get her away from Kazuto. Obviously cause he was like super jealous if Kanna thought about anyone but him and that’s why he wanted her entire world to just be him and his house.

He then locks her up in his bedroom saying that he will provide food/etc for and in the epilogue she’s been living in that room for about 2 weeks. Because she’s so sickened of what he did, she hasn’t been eating anything and lost weight. He’s still pissed off about Kazuto and keeps asking if she’s forgotten about him yet SIGH UGH GOD DAMN WHY DO YOU HAVE TO RUIN A CHARACTER OTOMATE WHY. So then she says she loves him and that she won’t leave him without him having to do this and it seems like he’s back to normal…until he tells her to hold a knife as he lunges into it. He says that unless she kills him he’ll continue to go nuts and keep her  trapped in his house forever. She refuses but he like threatens her and says if she doesn’t stab him he’ll keep her here forever and so he runs into the knife and says “NOW ILL BE IN YOUR HEART FOREVER” before falling to his death. His final words are “you win, go wherever you want.” She’s like go wherever I want huh? And so I guess she stabbed herself too so they could go to hell together. Fuck this sheit. (ノಥ益ಥ)ノ 彡┻━┻ Oh my god man Love end? what is this Love end? Is Love the new word for hate/bad endings now? The worst part is, even if I were to play the bad end before the good end, it ruins the character so much, I don’t think I’d even want to play the good end afterwards cause I’d be so disgusted. I almost thought Maximillian would be my fav character in this game – especially since one of the guides I followed said he was their favorite….BUT NOT SO MUCH NOW. You know honestly thanks to TYB Dark Cherry whenever I hear a guy saying “I just want to lock you up in a room” I START GETTING BAD VIBES. When I heard him say that line in the bond route, I was like oh god don’t make the love route be creepy stalker route….I WAS TROLLED SO HARD. UGH afhfklshklskjs way to ruin a character for me alsfhsfhljkh      ((((ノ`皿´)ノ ⌒┫:・┫┻┠’. Needless to say, Max had no kiss CGs…oh well not like I care at this point… ( ´_ゝ`)

Yuuki Beresford – In Yuuki’s route, some dude named Raymond tells Kanna that if she doesn’t come along with them they will kill her and Yuuki so she unwillingly agrees. She’s taken to the union base – so now the next 3 guys you do in this game will be the ones at this place. The leader there is named Robert Nicholson and his immediate follower is Keith Vidye. Over there a woman named Julianna gives her a uniform and tells her that she will start training. The next day Raymond apologizes for being rude and then explains that currently their base is in battle with that military base from the last 2 routes because they’re totalitarian while this one is about freedom. Lol obviously a base lead by Maximillian  is like naziland 😆 and he’s not happy that these guys want “freedom” so that’s why he referred to them as the “rebellion.” Later that day Keith comes to Kanna telling her that she can see Yuuki but when she comes to see him he’s no longer a cute shota…he’s a 19 year old sleeping dude. Kanna is shocked but then Keith explains that they basically had to try an experimental thing on Yuuki’s body which caused him to like grow 4 years…otherwise he would have died because he injured like most of his organs & bones. Σ(Д`|||ノ)ノ When he finally wakes up, he’s now a soldier for this base and he has no memory of Kanna. Keith explains that at this point Yuuki had so much brain damage that he lost part of his memory and they’ve decided to just train him as a soldier. The next day Kanna is so upset about all of this and Julianna asks Yuuki to take her back to her room. While walking there Yuuki explains that he wears an eyepatch because his left eye is a different color, and then he asks why Kanna always looks so sad when looking at him. Before she can answer Keither intercepts using cockblock and it’s super effective. When Kanna asks him why they lied to Yuuki saying his eye was a donation from a “cousin” (that Yuuki never had), Keith says he’s not obliged to tell her and this is all in order to get Kanna in their hands.

In Yuuki’s bonds route, one day when Yuuki comes into her room and brings her some cookies, she’s reminded of how the old Yuuki loved sweets as well and starts crying. He asks her “do I really remind you of someone else?” and then he leaves. A few days later Keith shows Kanna Evangelion Unit 01 Run=Dim saying her parents built this ultimate weapon of destruction and it can only start up with her genes. He says that they can shove her in there anytime they want to but they won’t unless it’s the absolute last resort. She then has a dream where she’s back at the shopping mall with the old Yuuki and when she wakes up she cries in front of Keith. Keith tells her that Yuuki found a “girl to protect” and while he didn’t say who the girl is, he’s like “you should know right Kanna?” Before Yuuki goes off to another battle, Kanna gives him the 4 leaf clover the old Yuuki gave to her before the attack that day. She says it’s like a good luck charm so that he comes back safely. Later that day he comes into her room telling her that he keeps seeing dreams where someone is calling his name and he uses “boku” instead of “ore”. Kanna then hugs him and the 2 get all ichaicha and before he goes he kisses her asking that when he returns for her to give him a kiss back. So uh 5 seconds later battle’s over and Yuuki returns saying the war is going to come to an end. He then asks her to kiss him as promised and she does but then Robert comes up with his ossan stories about how he used to have a cute girlfriend in the past too. 😆 During the celebration party, Yuuki and Kanna sneak off to his room where they confess their love to each other and make out. In the epilogue they win the war but Yuuki loses his legs and can never walk again. Keith tells Kanna to “become his legs” for him and she vows that it’s now her turn to protect him. Yuuki tells her that he doesn’t want to take her freedom away with his disability but Kanna’s like “shut up foo’ and be loved” and she kisses him saying she’ll always be by his side.

Two months later as Yuuki is recovering, he asks Kanna to tell him all about his past self from Sujiku as she wheels him around in a wheelchair. He then says he’ll make her happy to his best ability and they kiss. Poor poor Yuuki…why is it so hard to just give someone in this game a truly happy ending… (ಥ_ಥ)In the basterdize-your-favorite-character, er I mean “love” route, after Yuuki comes back from a battle Kanna blows on his wound like you would to a child because that’s what she used to do to him when they were kids. This causes some memories to pop up in Yuuki’s head and he gets a massive headache and admits that he often gets these headaches because he feels unknown memories coming back to him. He then says he doesn’t understand why Kanna keeps caring about him so much but when he tries to remember he gets a headache again. In this route Kanna’s obsession with the old Yuuki is pretty bad in this route to the point that Yuuki slaps dat ho when she complains that they’re sending him on a dangerous mission. He then apologizes and before his battle he hugs Kanna for good luck. When he returns from battle he’s badly injured and when Kanna goes to visit him, she finds him sleeping and out of his hand falls the pair ring that they bought the day of the attack on Sujiku. When Yuuki wakes up he says he saw a dream where he was younger than he is now and he lived peacefully and went to school with Kanna. Kanna lies and says that this is them in the future when the war is over and everything is peaceful again. He also says that he has no idea why he has this ring but feels like it’s something important to him.

So even though Kanna fucking knows that bringing Yuuki’s memory back hurts his brain she’s like LOL IMA DO IT ANYWAY and she decides to take Yuuki to Sujiku to make him remember everything. ( ゚,_ゝ゚)バカジャネーノ Fortunately he wakes up in time telling her to stop being a crazy bitch and says that running away won’t solve anything. Not too soon after, Keith informs Yuukithat they need to use Run=Dim and now Kanna’s required to fullfill her duties as the start button! Yuuki then volunteers to pilot the weapon because he wants to be by Kanna’s side. He informs Kanna of what’s going to happen and then says he’ll do his best to protect her. He then hugs her and confesses his love and says she will be his first and last lover. The night before the Run=Dim battle, Kanna comes to Yuuki’s room and he asks if she can sleep with him (platonically 8D)  and she agrees. She sees a dream where the past and current Yuuki appear and they say that they love her but when she wakes up Yuuki’s no longer in bed with her. She goes to start up the Dim=Run weapon and Yuuki says that their hearts are connected. This is where he admits that his memories all returned and he says he knew he died once but this was his second chance to bring a peaceful world back to Kanna. Needless to say, Yuuki dies in battle. ┐(‘~`;)┌ Afterwards Keith brings a recording that Yuuki left in the cockpit of the robot where he says that he always loved her and that he will leave his ring with her. He says he’s sorry, and the he loves her and wishes for her happiness. Well I have to say that Yuuki’s character basterdization route didn’t RUIN the character for me like with Max but it would be nice if in the “love” route nobody fucking died sigh whatever I give up all hope for this game lol.

Keith Vidye – Keith is the freedom army’s Mr. Hardboiled character but his image is broken when Robert sends him and Kanna to the toy store to pick up a stuffed bear for his 7 year old daughter. Kanna starts giggling when she sees him carrying a giant stuffed animal and so they take a break in the park where he asks her to tell him about her father. I decided to do Keith’s character basterdization route first since I didn’t want to leave off on a bad note like with ther 3 dudes before this. When he tries to teach her how to use a gun, he like gets behind her and holds her hands but she’s all like (/ρ\)いやーん and when he realizes that he’s getting all touchy feely with her  he gets embarrassed himself. Kanna’s like “yippie I cracked the hard boiled egg!” and Keith says that he will have to give her special treatment and that he will protect her. One day Julianna shows photos of her and Keith as lolis & shotas and says how despite him being a hardboiled bastard he used to be a cute little crybaby. Kanna asks if Keith is Julianna’s fiance but she says she doesn’t need to be jealous because she already has another fiance and Keith is just her childhood friend. After Ronney’s death, Julianna cries and tells Kanna to be by Keith’s side because he’s upset as well but hiding his emotions. Worried about Keith, she runs to his room and finds him showering….with his clothes on. She asks to be by his side as he cries and asks her not to look at him. Some days later Keith tells Kanna that he always needed to smoke a cigarette to be able to fall asleep but now that he can see her face it relaxes him enough that he can quit ruining his lungs. So in the final battle he sacrifices himself to save the rest of his crew and gives Kanna his cross necklace saying he wants her to live on. He then says that he’s always loved her and asks her to say his name one last time. In his bonds route, Kanna decides to stop angsting over the fact that they have to fight Sujiku people.

Robert comes into her room one night to give her a birthday party invitation for Baile twins birthday party and when Keith comes in he pretends to be hitting on Kanna making Keith really jealous. Then he’s like LOL JUST KIDDING and walks out leaving Keith alone with Kanna. Unfortunately both Raymond and Ronney die the morning of their birthday so needless to say the party’s over. Kanna then finds Keith crying at their graves because they were supposed to turn 21 that day and he couldn’t protect them. He quickly rebounds after this and tells Kanna their room will be cleared within a week and a new person will be living there soon. Kanna is shocked at how he can get over it so quickly and then she has some girl talk with Julianna who tells her to go see Keith. She goes into his room and then he shows up and tells her about the cross necklace he has. He then tells her he doesn’t want to use her as a weapon and he wants her to be by his side. When she asks if thats his feelings as a person or as an army commander he says army commander. Kanna then bitches at him saying she wants to know his true feelings and after he whines about how many people he’s killed, he hugs her asking if she can hear the beating of his heart~. Julianna later tells Kanna that Keith went off to school at the age of 15 and he never knew the warmth of a family. She asks Kanna to teach him what it’s like to live peacefully and be like a loving family to him. When he comes into her room one day, she’s in an apron making dinner for him and he’s like (  Д ) ゚ ゚ and suddenly gets all dere and hugs her saying this is what he always wanted! Suddenly Kanna’s like I love you! But before she can finish her sentence he’s like NO I SAY IT FIRST and then he confesses to her and they make out. Power of the apron! In the epilogue suddenly the war is over and Keith asks Kanna to live with him since they’re no longer commander & officer but lovers. Two months later they’re living together happily ever after. Meh Keith was rather anti-climatic to be honest and I didn’t really feel the same kind of romantic build up as other routes so it was weird when suddenly…I LOVE YOU! …just cause he saw Kanna in an apron lol. He also kept mumbling his words most of the time and was so unemotional…actually he was like a man Ayanami Rei now that I think about it. Blue hair red eyes lack of emotion….seriously the game makers aren’t doing anything to convince me they didn’t rip Eva off! 😆

Boris Adamov – In Boris’ route she’s now in Sujiku, the middle ground between the totalitarian and freedom armies trying to defend their peaceful land. The leader of the Oracle army here is Boris and his sidekick Ispada (I think I butchered his name but who the hell knows what it should be in English lol.) Her wingwoman in this place is Lips (?? lol) who has man hair, man clothes man voice and a pair of tits. Boris shows her a room with all the injured people and it comes as a shock for her, but at the same time she’s very sad at the reality of Sujiku. To be honest it doesn’t help that Ookawa Tohru voices this guy but he’s also a 30 year old ossan and like 14 years older than Kanna…so yea not really too thrilled to pair these 2 up. In the love route he asks Kanna to help out at the injured person area and says if any injured guys try to return to battle, to tie them to bed and make sure they recover. During one of the battles, Lips self destructs since there’s no way out and the next morning reality hits Kanna that she will no longer be there for her every morning. When Kanna talks to Boris about it they reflect on Lips past and how she was like a younger sister to everyone. Then another battle happens and they hear Boris yelling followed by an explosion. He doesn’t come back for some time and Kanna keeps crying in his room until one day he shows up making her baww some more. He then does a pinky promise with her saying that he will always return to her. Whatever ossan I’m not moved lol. ( ・´ー・`) He then turns into a blushing old man and gives her a small music box as a present. So then in the final battle Kanna’s like “I wanna fight too!” and he’s like stfu little girl and get in the bomb shelter. Despite her confession of love to him, Boris goes out to fight like a manly ossan but not before giving her a manly smooch and saying he loves her. Lol @ how Boris gets a kiss CG but Maximillian, Kazuto and Keith don’t. PRIORITIES.

In the epilogue the war is over and magically BORIS IS ALIVE AND RETURNS TO HER. For a moment I thought it was a miracle and we’d actually get a happy love end but..nope turns out it was all her illusion and he was dead after all rofl. In the bonds route, Kanna goes all hysterical that Boris won’t let her go and fight with everyone and he’s like shut up little girl you couldn’t kill a fly. He then says that she’s needed in the infirmary and he gives her hug in which the CG suddenly shaves like 5 years off his face. He then tells her about his family and  suddenly that’s when Kanna realizes she’s in love with him even though he’s like 14 years older than her. She then asks him if he has someone he likes and he says it’s one sided and then he hugs her saying that he wants to end this one sidedness already. He then starts kissing her saying he’ll protect her and what does she do? SHE RUNS OFF LIKE A MORON LOL. Oh god what the hell (ಠ_ಠ). So then she decides to let him know that she likes him too and so she goes to his room and sits on the bed next to him learning her head on his shoulder. Boris’ pedobear instincts kick in and he pushes her down on the bed but then feeling guilty he’s like “lol just kidding” much to her dismay 😆 In the epilogue the war is still going but now Kanna’s helping with all the Oracle members’ training. One day Isupada  shows up saying that all 3 sides decided to join forces and stop the war and so Kanna then goes to Boris’s room and they celebrate by confessing their love and making out. Overall – meh ossan lol. I couldn’t pay attention because Ookawa Tohru just sounded like he could be Kanna’s dad…not lover eugh lol. Also what the hell’s with the Russian name anyway. Funny how they’re both from the same place yet Kanna’s name is Japanese. I don’t even know what country this whole game is supposed to take place anymore.

Joker – Joker is like the informant to the Oracle and he often comes & goes to deliver news & information to Boris. In Joker’s love route, Kanna has a dream where Yuuki and Kazuto get killed and when she wakes up crying for help she finds herself in Joker’s house. He lies and says that he took her here on Boris’ orders because the Oracle base was to be attacked and has become unapproachable. When he leaves and tells her to stay home, she gets bored and looks through his stuff finds letters written by her parents. When Joker gets home he’s not exactly pleased at her findings and decides to tell her a “fairy tale”. The story is about a man named Raphael Bailey who lived a peaceful life with his parents until he was kidnapped at the age of 10. He woke up in a hospital and the doctors said he has some dreadful disease that spreads through air and therefore until they cure it, he cannot leave the hospital. And so until he was 16 he kept living in the hospital going through all sorts of surgeries and being fed various types of drugs. Another 5 years had passed and at the age of 21 Raphael was finally able to leave the hospital, but when h returned to Sujiku most of the people he knew were gone/labeled as dead. His parents didn’t even recognize him and his father died 1 year later.Nobody gave a shit about him so he decided to seek revenge by changing his personality and name and becoming a different person. He did various info gathering and found out that he wasn’t sick but in fact was a lab monkey for Kanna’s parents. They pretended like they cared about his well being but in fact they were fooling him all for their scientific research. He then concludes his story by saying that his real name is Raphael Bailey and he basically now wants to take all his rage out on Kanna, the daughter of the assholes who betrayed him! /(^o^)\ナンテコッタイ

So afterwards he locks up Kanna in the bedroom – a la Maximillian – and she refuses to eat because she doesn’t understand why Joker won’t kill her and he’s like “I could kill you any time but…….!” I guess his plan for revenge isn’t going just as keikaku since he’s pretty much fallen for Kanna at this point. She even has a dream where he says he loves her to death. When she wakes up she finds him sleeping next to her and he asks her to call him by his real name Raphael. He says he was jealous of her smiling to her childhood friends in hs dream and then asks her to pet him on the head like a baby nuko so he can relax and fall asleep. A few days later she wakes up to the sound of dishes breaking  and runs out of her room, which is strangely unlocked. When she gets to the kitchen she finds him sitting on the floor next to a broken plate and stabbing his arm with one of the pieces going “I was trying to make you dinner and then……” over and over again. Kanna’s like wtf are you trying to die foo? And he responds with “no I had this pain in my chest and I tried to stop it~!” Oh god not this shit again ヽ(;´Д`)ノヤメテー And so Kanna gives him a bear hug to calm him the fuck down because he’s obviously lost his marbles thanks to his shell breaking due to being in love with her. When she asks him why he doesn’t lock the door to her room anymore he says because he wants to try trusting someone again, back like before he was betrayed. In the epilogue they both decide to fuck the world and live together but then Joker says that the only way he can get Kanna to smile again is if he disappears…and as they make out on the bed he….dies? Lol I don’t even know but that’s the impression I got. Maybe he took some poison or drug or something I dunno…sigh whatever :roll:In Joker’s bonds route, he takes her back to his house as well. The love comedy continues when one morning she runs into him only wearing a towel as he strolls out of the shower and she’s like (*ノ∀ノ)イヤン.

And so their raburabu life continues, except this time he doesn’t lock her up in a room and they live like a normal couple until one day Kanna stumbles upon the letters to “Raphael” again. When Joker finds out he then says that he had planned to kill her and tells her the story about her parents concluding that she’s just a tool for his revenge. He goes MIA for a while leaving the house open for Kanna to escape any time but she patiently waits for him crying every night. One night when she’s sleeping he returns and stands over her saying that he was jealous that her parents gave her attention instead of him. He then admits that she’s precious to him and starts crying; which is when Kanna wakes up and hugs him. Afterwards he says she’s free to do as she wants and he asks her to go out with him. He then takes her to the graves of his parents and says to them that he wants to redo his life all over again thanks to Kanna. They then both confess their feelings to each other and in the epilogue they return to Kanna’s old town. He plans to meet with her parents once more to see if the smile they gave him in the past was real or fake. They both then decide to be together forever no matter what yay. Well Joker was prolly the same age as Boris if not older but he didn’t FEEL like an ossan you know? He was cute and playful and stuff so he was actually interesting to play through (aside from when he lost his brain in the bad route but what else is new in there.) I really liked his story but on the other hand, it felt suddenly like any trace of the world war flew out the window. It was like “wow was there really a war? cause it’s like nothing is happening except raburabu time with Joker” (ಠ_ಠ)Well not that I’m complaining since the war stuff was probably the thing I cared least about in this game. The happy end route left me unsatisfied, as most of this game did since I wanted to see the reactions on Kanna’s parents’ faces when they met the guy they experimented on. In other news, why are her parents alive anyway? I thought back in Kazuto & Max’s routes it was revealed that they’re dead lol. Oh well CONSISTENCY.

Wow so where do I even start! Even though the artist for this game was the same as Souten no Kanata, the stand in pics all felt unfinished…as if they just took rough sketches and half assedly applied some colors to them. The visiting scenes for all the guys felt like an extreme waste of time because they’d say about 3 sentences and boom scene over. During auto-mode I’d get a popup screen with a choice before a person was even finished speaking. There were these “demo missions” which I have no idea what they were for. If you answered the questions presumably correctly it raised some kind of stats but even if I got them wrong I was still able to get both endings…so yea no idea what the hell the point of that even was? There were multiple instances of Evangelion ripoffs and I was also told this game copies the plot of MuvLuv (which I haven’t played so I can’t comment.) The true ends in this game must have been the “love” ends or as I had said “character basterdization ends” because in the “happy” ends you got the general ending video but in the “love” ends the character song video came up. Guess the truth of war is EVERYBODY DIES LOL…EVEN IF THEY DON’T DIE DIRECTLY BECAUSE OF THE WAR /(^o^)\ナンテコッタイ. I really don’t get why they had to make these endings where the characters had to die. In EVERY SINGLE LOVE END either the character, the heroine or both would die and it’s not like these were bad ends. The bad ends in this game, which there were many of, would just END the game. Well for all I know there could have been other stuff in those bad ends but like I could care less to find out :roll:. I have no comments on the heroine because she was pretty much bland and would change from “I’ma go kick some ass” to “Kyaa save me I’m so helpless” every time so she was like a log to me after a while only existing there for the sake of the weapon plot. Too much stuff in this game gave me flashbacks of that damn Armen Noir troll game and the shortness and lack of any sense brought back the memories of Edel Blume. The music was meh, the CG quality varied depending on the character and overall it was like they just shoved the game out in the same fashion as AN just to get it out before the holiday season. It’s like they didn’t want to put just a bit more work to polish it up and just barfed it out because they had to follow a release schedule. I would have forgiven them because some of the romance scenes (especially in Maximillian and Yuuki’s routes) were cute but then the “love” endings ruined it for me and I just wanted to get this game out of my hair. Can’t say I recommend this to anybody unless you’re some crazy war otaku or you actually enjoyed Armen Noir AND Edel Blume…. ( ´_ゝ`).

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13 thoughts on “Otome Game Review: PANDORA ~Kimi no Namae wo Boku wa Shiru~

  1. lool i’m such a sucker for romanticized war-themed stories but… this… hmmmmmm LOL i wish they would make a good one once and for all (i mean an was also kinda screwy so =/)

  2. Yeah, I pretty much had a feeling that this game would be like Armen Noir. Which is a shame, because Kazuto is really cute, and it seems he got really shafted in this game. Why the hell do games do this? Place such importance in childhood friends, and then shaft them like this? I love the childhood friend trope, because I love it in real life, but in games, they just shaft those friends. And I’m not even going to comment on the “lock you up” thing. Maybe it’s th substitute for rape in all ages games? Because it makes me rage almost as hard.

    Also, it might be because I’m seeing a thumbnail version of the CGs, but Joker kind of looks like the Green Ranger. Maybe that’s why he didn’t feel like an ossan to you.

  3. This game was released on the same day as CZ so I’ve seen the name before however it’s really been forgotten.. the lack of quality is unbelievable once you look closely. Bad art, bad story… I’m not surprised at all to hear you confirming it’s a kuso-game. I was surprised to hear you were playing it. Kimi hontou ni sugoi yo.. kuso-game mo yatterun da.. Otomate really makes a lot of crap. But now you’re done with the crap, you still have some better titles waiting for you, Hiiro series, S.Y.K. and Desert Kingdom are decent games I think (or according to reviews).

  4. LOL I wanna see a person who can actually enjoy Armen Noir AND Edel Blume, if such person exists. xD Well no wonder this game is forgotten.. and WTF is wrong with Max’s love ending!? Σ(Д`|||ノ)ノ It’s almost as bad as KuroKin minus the rape. Guys who say “I wanna lock you up” are creepy *cough hammer cough*, but this is taking it to a whole new level.

    *stays away from pandora* …おつかれw

  5. I heard that the only things that the staff pushed in their interviews were 1: its short, 2: 軍服萌え. well, they were honest…they didn’t lie about how long it is how or how fabulous the story is…and I just realized that the artist is actually the same person as Souten no Kanata! y I haven’t realized…

  6. ほたる> because maybe the CGing in Souten was a million times better ? 😄 wow so being short was supposed to be a high point? e_e? I’d almost rather have a game with only 3 guys to capture if they had decently developed characters sigh… I guess I don’t have a 軍服萌え so that did nothing to me haha.

    Rin> Well I liked Knives in AN but lol I can’t even remember anyone in Edel Blume other than the guy who was voiced by Mizushima haha 8D; lol Max’s love ending….now when I hear “i want to lock you up” I’m gonna have trauma lolol

    yukiru> oh that’s right I forgot it had the same release time as CZ but last year I chose to play CZ over this….good thing I did huh haha. I play pretty much anything if the system is straight forward. i only ever quit games because the “system” is bad not because the story and everything else is poopy XDD

    gothicat> its weird but childhood friends seem to really get shafted in otome games. in eroge theyre usually pioneered but in otome its like totally the opposite…i have no idea why the hate haha.

    hairband> i’m not a fan of war stories but if they can do it WELL i’ll let it slide. honestly if they just got rid of all the idiotic “love” endings, this game might have been less enraging 😆

  7. Wow. I think the art is beautiful and guys are sooo hot… omg, I don’t know who’s better! Although you don’t recommend this game, I’ll try it… maybe I will like it because of bishounen xD Their cloths in military style is really something…

  8. I don’t know but since the first time I know this, I don’t really take an interest in it. And fortunately, I did the right thing. And I can’t believe the artist is the same as souten no kanata. I want to play that souten badly, but I never have a chance (I’ve tried for a moment though).

    And I want to ask, if the artist is the same who make souten, is it the same for asaki yumemishi too? ’cause I never look at the chara design for both

  9. The artist for asaki yumemishi looks totally different to me so I don’t think it’s the same one. Souten’s CGer is obviously different from Otomates so even though the artist may have done the original “sketches” the person who colored them obviously has more skill at Mio then at Otomate 😆

  10. I am so disappointed in this game. Lol so, so disappointed ;____; I saw the website for it and wanted to play it but alas, it’s for PS2 and I don’t know if my laptop can handle that shizz so lol I was super excited to see you playing this… |’) figures the game is crap sigh. Oh, Otomate lol it seems like they’re hit or miss when it comes to otome games; you either get really great games or you get trolled lol

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