D3P had a blowout sale during the holidays so I picked up this kusoge for $10. I mean I knew in advance it was gonna be bad, as were the rest of their 2015 releases but poor writing aside, they went the EXTRA MILE to aggravate me with the trophy completion. More on that in my final thoughts. Seri’s dad is a vamwolf (vampire + werewolf hybrid) hunter and he brings her to live with him in his big house full of other hunter dudes. They all just happen to be ikemans so when dad croaks, she’s left with these guys and is their housekeeper while she attends college. She wants to suddenly join them in vamwolf hunting and claims she can wield a gun because her dad had her play arcade shooting games. 😂 They agree  but on the first night of her hunting, she freaks out and nearly gets killed by a vamwolf. Everyone is against her continuing to hunt with them, but Seri is determined to prove that she’s more than a useless sack of potatoes whose name they won’t even call out loud. 😂 One night she finds a letter her dad left behind claiming one of the guys is a vamwolf, so now Seri goes around asking everyone dumb questions (like do you eat garlic?) to confirm who the vamwolf of the group is.

🛑 SPOILER ALERT: 🛑 Seri’s dad is a vamwolf and Seri is one too! So the entire game she goes around trying to figure out who the vamwolf is (although there IS one guy who is actually one) without knowing that she’s one herself! Hurp durp! All those vampire things clearly don’t work on a VAMWOLF because as it turns out, they are things to repel vampires not VAMWOLVES I guess! This is just a stupid hypothesis because they never do explain what the living hell a vamwolf is and all the descriptions they give basically match a vampire so I honestly don’t know what the difference is. I guess D3P couldn’t decide if they were Team Jacob or Team Edward so they were like

Anyway with that in mind on to my half-assed summaries (rants? rambles?)

Tokiwa Ryunosuke – Ryu is the youngest of the bunch, being still in high school, and the long awaited role for Kishio to fulfill the sad seiyuu hole in my heart. He has the power to see the future as part of  his blood line.  He’s also a popular model and sometimes fangirls hover over him on the street. After enough flirting with Seri, she gets turned into a vamwolf during one of their missions because she’s attacked. After he’s raging for blood, Ryu says he will kill her but then quickly changes his mind saying he will protect her instead. Uhhm okay? And then she randomly gets kidnapped by badbuys.jpg who I can’t even remember. Ryu comes to save her, then gets turned into a vamwolf himself. She convinces him not to run away and die and they hide their vamwolfness amazingly from the other hunters by sucking each other’s blood, hooray! Oh and they then run away and drop out of school/college (I didn’t even know Seri was in college lmao) and become painters that secretly sell their artworks to support themselves. They also adopt 2 terribly sounding dogs because D3P can’t afford to  buy barking sfx. In the other ends Seri continues being a vamwolf while Ryunosuke is not but for some reason she has no blood cravings so it all magically works out!

Kingetsu Yuuya – Is the doctor of the group and always rages at everyone to take care of their health. His family was killed by vamwolves so he became a hunter to take revenge. Seri told him not to bother because it won’t bring his family back and they bonded since her dad was killed the same way. So eventually he confesses his love to her while drunk and she magically feels the same way. Insert vamwolf plot and she’s attacked during a mission and turns into one herself. Yuuya knows this but says he won’t tell anyone cause he’s in love with her and wants to protect her etc. He cuts his own skin and lets her drink his blood to satisfy her cravings. Unfortunately for them the others find out that she’s a vamwolf and attack them. During the fight Yuuya turns himself into a vamwolf too. Then they realize it’s stupid to fight and get over themselves and become allies again. 🤷‍ In the epilogue,  many years later they’ve outlived all their hunter friends and moved into some old castle while working on a vamwolf vaccine. In the good end, Yuuya gets arrested for hiding the fact that Seri is a vampire but then all his bros sacrifice themselves so the two of them can run away and have babbies 😂. The fact that she’s a vamwolf seems to have been forgotten lmao. In the bad end Seri becomes a human experimental subject while she lays there like a vegetable.

Shinonome Nagisa – Nagisa has a massive UV allergy so he has to wear SPF55 sunblock at all times when going outside. He is literally the worst boy because not only does he casually offer to  teach Seri to smoke cigarettes (before quickly stopping due to guilt of getting her addicted), he hates cats. I don’t know how they managed to walk into a cat cafe and miss all the obvious cat photos that every cat cafe ever has plastered on their front doors. 😑 He gets turned into a vamwolf but unlike other routes he has really bad blood cravings. Seri offers her blood to him by constantly slicing her hands. Everyone finds out about his vamwolf thing but again unlike other routes they’re just like oh whatever we ain’t gonna tell the church or anyone have fun you too hohoho! 🙄 In the other ends they reveal that Seri has these draculina genes and is similar to a vamwolf. (Well it’s because she IS a vamwolf since her dad is one hur dur.)

Nitou Keidai – Loves playing them vidya games and stays up till morning raiding with his party. He’s also a lush who keeps a stash of alcohol in his room and starts drinking as early as the morning. Literally nothing happens in this route except they just hang out,  do house things and drink wine. 🤦‍ Then they remembered there’s a plot and Keidai decided since Seri kept looking for a vamwolf in him,  he went and became one. So when she’s like uh that’s not what I wanted he flips his shit 😂. He goes and stabs himself and has to get emergency surgery done. 😑. When he awakens,  he and Seri run away together yay! In that other end he reveals that he killed Seri’s dad upon his request. Also he becomes a priest. His route was full of cgs that were near kisses but no actual lips touching. I guess all of that went to Nagisa instead. (눈_눈)

Aoi Shuichi – Was looking forward to this route because of Namikawa and to end this godawful snoozefest once and for all. ️Shuichi has some massive claustrophobia and has a meltdown when Seri accidentally shuts the door to his room at night. This is because he was once buried alive.  😥Anyway after a whole bunch of nothing suddenly plot hits and they reveal that Shuichi is  a vamwolf, Seri’s daddyo was a vamwolf, Seri is a draculina,  and is kidnapped by  some douche who is secretly using Keidai as his personal servant.  He wants to use Seri’s draculina blood to take control of all the vamwolves for his personal army. Shuichi tries to fight them but gets badly hurt so he drinks her magical draculina blood and is instantly cured! 😂 Also turns out Seri’s dad is alive and he,  Seri and Shuichi all run away together. 🤷‍🙃 The other end gives more information revealing that Shuichi was born in 1886, and served in many wars and then joined the hunter organization in hopes their research would turn him human. Just then daddyo shows up revealing he was born in the edo period and Seri’s mom was a human. The bad guy shows up revealing that Seri’s mom died cause it was fatal to give birth to a vamwolf. Then dad shoots himself to join his wife and tells Shuichi to take care of his daughter. 🤷‍ And he does cause they run away and make vamwolf babies. Ok I guess Shuichi had the most plot out of all of them, but as usual the endings were cut short because D3P budget does not include quality writers.

This was quite the kusoge, but I am not in any way surprised because D3P doesn’t give a shit about their otome game division and would rather make money from their titty game division. Let’s start with the system that made me  want to throw my Vita out the window. The first part is this bullshit called “Vampire Mission“. This ain’t no fucking mission, you just pick a stupid keyword that you may think would be a reason why the guy is a vampire. This includes crap like “oh he likes tomatoes he must be a vampire!” or “oh he can see well at night and hates the sun!”  Yea you know, I like tomatoes too, the light shining in my bedroom from the street makes me see well at night and I fucking hate the sun blaring in my face when I’m at my computer too! I guess I’m a vamwolf!?!?111 So that entire aspect is idiotic, and of course, the guys know it’s idiotic and when you accuse them of such stupidity they get pissed off —– which leads into system #2 “Sadistic Time“. D3P…have you even played Diabolik Lovers? Do you even know what sadistic means? Sadistic isn’t kabedoning and kissing the girl or being like “rowr how about I pull you into bed (while we are fully clothed) with me and stare at you for like 30 seconds until you blush”. And of course the final punch here that you need to use every keyword to get every Sadistic Time Event and to complete every “mission”. THAT MEANS YOU HAVE TO REPLAY AT LEAST 4 OF THE ROUTES TWICE. I was literally missing the final trophy because in Yuuya’s route I had picked “Tomato” in chapter 6 and instead I had to go back a 2nd time and pick “Red Wine” instead. BECAUSE LIKING TOMATOES AND RED WINE MUST MEAN YOU’RE A VAMWOLF!!!!!!!!

Now that the system bullshit is out of the way let’s talk about the dumb writing. I mean what’s there to talk about? Seri lives as some kind of housekeeper maid, she comes on these vamwolf hunting missions but mostly does nothing except freak out and maybe shoot at air once in a while. She claims to go to college, but I’ve never once seen a single scene where she discusses having to do homework, or leave for class. She mentions it here & there but she sure has a lot of time to go around accusing the hunters of drinking red wine and eating garlic than studying for exams. The routes themselves literally NOTHING happens for 6 chapters then in chapters 7~ they’re like oh shit, vamwolves! Yea! They throw in some quick b/s plot but ultimately most ends are along the line of “they ran off together and lived happily ever after~”. (눈_눈)　Then her dad, who plays Houdini  by appearing & disappearing for no apparent reason and then the entire premise of “why the hell did the guys fall in love with her anyway?” Maybe Yuuya and Ryunosuke were convincing but everyone else go away. Not even Namikawa can convince me why the hell his character falls in love with her all of a sudden. I mean maybe because she walked in on a lot of them half naked made their hearts flutter. 😂

The music was nothing special, and the CGS and sprites looked weird. In some of the sprites the guy were packing some man-cleavage……

…….and a lot of the CGs were ridiculously inconsistent. In some of them the characters were unrecognizable.

But meh honestly I am willing to let bad art go if the story and characters are fun and engaging – everything this game was not which is why it took me a month to drag myself through it even though each route only took about 3-4 hours if I just sat down and forced it down my throat.

Needless to say this game was a pile of 💩 and I’m glad I barely spent anything on it. However, the system rage reminded me of the bullshit I had to deal with here and here and I’m now literally changing my mind about getting Nightshade when it’s out. I know Nightshade is a straight VN but the idea of giving D3P more money makes my blood boil lol. They even had the balls to release $2 PSN additional scenario DLCs. Like hell I’ll buy more scenario from this garbage game. 🖕🖕

The only positive thing I can say about this game is it had all my favorite ossan hoihoi seiyuus like Sugita, and Kishio in addition to Maeno & Namikawa. 😂