Otome Game Review: Cupid Parasite ~Sweet and Spicy Darling~

Real talk though, Lynette quitting her job to be a  housewife is just WTF. I’m glad it didn’t happen but entertaining the idea and there even being a character who wanted nothing but it…how Japanese can you get. It’s kinda what I appreciated about Bustafellows. They put a lot more research into American culture and nuances. Otomate just took Japan and put it into a New York/Los Angeles background of what they “think” American culture is. I mean in one scene Lynette and Gill were bowing to the ambulance workers. Who does that in America unless you are Japanese doing it to other Japanese people? ಠ_ಠ Also having seggz in a smelly oily car garage is not sexy Gill sorry. ┐(´д`)┌ Also holy shit Spicy End….I did not expect yandere Gill Noo…..∑(ﾟωﾟ; )カ¨ーン Other side note is, I loved shipping Claris and Robin in this route. It’s not often you get to ship side characters in otome!

Disappointed we never got sprites for Raul’s parents. They were really fun and kinda reminded me of Teuta’s parents from Bustafellows energy. But anyway what the fuck is that LOBSTER PLOT. I have no words.

A family curse that turns people into lobsters, the family made the heir be allergic so he wouldn’t turn into one, he got bullied in school for not being able to eat his family’s lobsters and then is taking revenge on the bullies from MIDDLE SCHOOL (who remembers their middle school bullies!?) and wants to turn the world into lobsters. And then Lynette is magically rescued by Sebastian because he happened to overhear the entire plot and knows the recipes for all the lobster drugs. I’m sorry what. Despite the weirdness I think Raul had way better endings than Gil. The Sweet & Spicy and Spicy endings were actually my favorites and I say this as someone who didn’t even like Raul in the first game!

I completely forgot that Shellby didn’t know that Lynette was Cupid so the fact that this was one of their marital arguments was actually interesting. But that, and most of their marital squabbles were usually resolved pretty quickly (including the erectile dysfunction which was resolved by eating a snapping turtle because Japan.) It was also really sweet of Shellby to start doing research on Greek Mythology (and even getting help from Raul) so he could learn more about Lynette’s history. They didn’t go into the lobster subplot in this one so I guess that was unique to Raul’s route. I didn’t expect Shellby to have a bad end in his route since the Gill and Raul didn’t but I guess the writers really wanted an adultery NTR end. ┐(´д`)┌

It felt so O/C because Lynette would never let herself stoop this low. She would work things out with Shellby and she would never give herself in to some asshole because her “BFF isn’t around to listen to her complaints”. The fuck dude. This is just catering to the NTR fetish but honestly I don’t feel like this kind of shit belongs in Cupid Parasite. (　´_ゝ`) I also hated Shellby’s spicy end because they basically made him yandere like Gill in where Lynette couldn’t be physically away from him for more than 5 meters. Overall Shellby was just turned into a typical Japanese salary man (like telling Lynette to quit her job because some guy was hitting on her really??) and then the Otomate stereotype of “possessive guy”. I know he’s generally the “Stiff perfect characater” but I feel like with Gill, this game did him a disservice.

Honestly I got annoyed at first with all the stupid misunderstandings since I hate those kind of plots and the typical boomer Japanese grandma pressuring him again. Fortunately it didn’t last that long and then it got really funny with Ray Under and Minerva in the picture. Ryuki’s Sweet & Spicy end was the BEST. The final CG was so sexy I was shocked like in the rest of the game he’s just a ~boy~ but thanks to the magic of Japanese bath salts, he turned into a MAN on his wedding night. ლ(́◉◞౪◟◉‵ლ) I’m just glad that Eli Omar barely made any appearances in this route cause I was sick of his lobster ass. (　´_ゝ`)

Unfortunately whoever wrote Eli’s stupid shit end, decided to have their way in Ryuki’s spicy ending by randomly making Ray Under “fall in love” with Lynette and then literally walk in while she was about to bang Ryuki and just sit there next to them and “watch”. Like wtf? And they just let him wut.

During the route Ray literally said he has 0 interest in Lynette and he only cares about making himself look good so the entire ending just felt OC and shoved in out of nowhere just for the 3P/NTR fetishes blah. I pretend I do not see. This ending does not exist to me (like many other endings in this game). ಠ_ಠ

Ok I seriously started crying and had to grab tissues when Allan and Lynette had to leave Losan York because everyone was aging except them. And then they came back 100 years later and Eli Omar’s island was just an overgrown abandoned amusement park and obviously by now all our other Parasite men would be dead. The entire thought of having them outgrow everyone made me so sad but then they met up with Claris since she’s a demon too and it made me so happy. (´;ω;`) But then the most ridiculous shit happened in the route. Being killed by Satan in Cupid Sylvie’s body, losing his voice because Otomate can’t afford Furukawa Makoto, and then despite being told MULTIPLE TIMES about how demons cannot reproduce we get a literal DEUS EX MACHINA BABY. I kid you not, a magical light impregnated Lynette and birthed kids that look like her and Allan and you GET TO NAME THEM and one of them is MAGICALLY AN ANGEL TOO. WTF. 😂😂😂😂 I burst out laughing so hard I started crying from laughter because WHAT IN THE WORLD.

They could have given a baby end to literally anyone else and they wouldn’t need to make this shit up. I refuse to believe the same writer who wrote the first game would have written this. Instead though my favorite ending was the Spicy End where Lynette and Allan protect the humans on earth from Satan and his cronies. The Sweet End was too damn sad with Lynette basically watching Allan be reborn as a human shota and having him be like “I know you’ve helped me all these years I wuv you oneesan” and her being like NOOO YOU MUST LIVE NORMAL HUMAN LIFE NOO. The Sweet-Bitter end they basically just enjoy travelling the world together and seeing sights and honestly it was so nice and cute. The naming is really misleading and I thought it was going to be sad..you know bittersweet but it wasn’t?? I think Otomate got their naming confused because the “Sweet” ending should have been the Bittersweet one while the other one should have been the Sweet end instead! Either way I only enjoyed the Sweet-Bitter and Spicy ends while the other 2 ends were too sad or too weird. ಠ_ಠ

Revealed my age with the greatest hits of 1997 up there. 😂😂😂 Anyway honestly it was so silly because …hey you guys are married? But you didn’t bang ever? I totally thought they did it at the end of the route in the first game but apparently not. Apparently it took Peter seeing Lynette walking by in a bath towel because she didn’t realize he’d get home early as she was coming out of the shower. The whole scene was also really stupid because he’s like “you walk around like this because you don’t see me as a man!!” but like I’m pretty sure she walks around like that because a) she’s comfortable around you as your wife b) she left her clothes in the bedroom because she figured you wouldn’t be home and who cares if she’s naked when home alone. Really?? The entire thing was screaming Japanese sexism of “you have to have shame even in your own house” bullshittery which is yet another one of those things I wish Otomate researched a bit about American culture.

Too much of the game feels like they’re trying to show an American game but shoving Japanese culture and standards upon the characters. I never felt this much annoyance about it in the first game so it makes me feel like the writing was handed off to people completely unfamiliar with the franchise..or they just ran out of ideas. If this wasn’t frustrating enough, they retconed the Zeus plot by saying oops we didn’t seal him properly and now hell and earth are gonna freeze over if we don’t kill him tehepero!

I honestly had wished the route had ended during the New Years celebration but when they brought the Zeus plot out I rolled my eyes (and had to plug my ears because GOOD GOD his voice actor burns my eardrums when he’s screeching like a banshee.) Anyway the Zeus part sucked but man nothing prepared me for the LITERAL BEASTIALITY ENDING WITH PETER TURNED INTO SOME WOLF FURRY UGHHHHH. 🤢🤢🤢

It was so gross I literally fast forwarded through until it ended because NO. (ノ# ﾟдﾟ)ﾉ ┫:･’∵:．┻┻:･’．:∵ Just cause Zeus canonically turned into a swan and screwed the ladies doesn’t mean you need to do a homage to it Otomate. And what’s worse, after they split New York and Los Angeles, they still used LOS ANGELES background in a scene where everyone was supposed to be in NY! There’s no palm trees in NYC Otomate! ༼ง=ಠ益ಠ=༽ง Honestly all the spicy ends (except Raul’s and Allan’s) can just burn in hell in this game. ಠ_ಠ

Maaan I just couldn’t get into this guy’s route. It was clear that he was shoved in last minute and he just didn’t really mesh with the rest of the parasites or the theme of the game at all. All the other guys are so outrageous and you just have “Mr. destiny” being like “omg I see your future through a donut hole”. He also basically kinda shoved himself and stalked Lynette over and over and I honestly just don’t really see how/why she fell for him at all?? It was that same type of O/C writing I have been complaining about the entire game but now it was even more painfully obvious because this guy wasn’t in the previous game. And the entire reason he can see the future? He was abducted by aliens in a corn field. Oh come ON 😂😂😂

The worst of course was the fact that on their way home from their Grand Canyon road trip, he decides “omg we’re gonna come back soon and I still haven’t banged you yet QUICK *strips*” and Lynette’s like “omg should I do this? I don’t even know if I Love this guy? Oh well Yolo” and just bangs him anyway. Like what the fuck is this. Who is this. Lynette would not do this??? It just felt so awful overall and before I could continue to be angry the game quickly moved into a plot about Chii-chan being an alien. ಠ_ಠ And then the final blow came when they brought Zeus back YET AGAIN to torment me one last time. (ノ# ﾟдﾟ)ﾉ ┫:･’∵:．┻┻:･’．:∵ I can’t believe they even threw in some shitty mascot character tribe that said Poop and Pee in their sentences. 💩💩💩💩 This was an incredibly anti-climatic way to end the game and honestly I wish this route never existed. Anyway this route ending in a nutshell:

HOLY FUCK OWEN WAS SO AMAZING, A LITERAL YANKEE ON THE INSIDE AND TRIED TO CHANGE HIS IMAGE TO BE ABLE TO FIND A WIFE. But instead he’s unable to because he just isn’t good at handling the ladies but the way he fumbled in front of Lynette and thanking him to help her and the way he just BLURTED OUT I LOVE YOU to her it was SO CUTE. 🥺🥺🥺🥺And the best part is he even got a kiss CG! YAAASSS! But yea I’m fucking mad that I had to waste like 6 hours on peepee poopoo aliens and I only got about 40 minutes with Owen who should have had a FULL ROUTE in this game. (ノ# ﾟдﾟ)ﾉ ┫:･’∵:．┻┻:･’．:∵