Otome Game Review: Diabolik Lovers -Haunted Dark Bridal-

Our heroine Komori Yui has been dumped by her priest father, told that he’s gone off to do work alone and can’t take her with him. Instead he tells her to go live in the house of an old acquaintance of his – but that house just happens to be filled with 6 RICH vampire brothers. Of course they’re not just your average blood suckers – they all have major psychological issues! Their father is a manslut vampire who loves the ladies so he knocked up 3 of them to have 6 kids currently ranging from ages 17 – 19. So now Yui has to live with these wackos and she tells them that she’ll be the one to decide who gets to suck her blood. However, as she spends more time being their therapist, she discovers a shocking secret inside her body.

A quick blurb about the system. It’s split into 3 sections for each guy Dark, Maniac & Ecstasy. It’s basically going from how the guys first treat Yui when she picks them, to basically them getting deredere to unhealthily obsessed with her. For the sake of coherency, I’m going to pretty much combine all 3 sections for each guy to make it a little easier to understand the story.

Sakamaki Kanato – Kanato seems like the shota of the group but he’s actually one of the triplets (along with Ayato and Laito) and 17 years old. He seems like he acts very spoiled and childish, always wanting to only eat sweets and carrying his teddy bear around. On top of this he is prone to throwing tantrums like a child so when Yui doesn’t give him his French Toast on time, he throws it in her face and starts stabbing her with a fork. ( ´_ゝ`) Despite all his raging, he actually does it in a polite way which actually made me burst out laughing a few times :lol:. Anyway here’s the deal with Kanato: He’s got a massive mother complex though it’s sadly justified. The triplets mom Cordelia is a HUGE slut and fucking LOOOVES dick so despite having 3 kids, she would go off on these trysts with Richter – her husband’s brother (aka the Sakamaki boys’ uncle.) Not only did she go off screwing this guy, SHE SCREWED HIM IN FRONT OF KANATO. She’d be like “oh don’t worry he’s busy playing with his teddy bear to care.” So because he never received mother’s love and instead saw his mother acting like a whore, you can imagine what kind of child he was raised as. Due to this he’s always needy and he often goes from bitching at Yui, to crying in her arms begging her to give him attention and hug him. AND THIS IS WHERE I FELL FOR IT LMAOO \(^o^)/. I walk in thinking Kanato’s a bratty little bitch but I walk out going OH YOU POOR CHILD ( ;∀;).

So on top of this Kanato is also an M and even though he acts like he’s all yanGIRE, when Yui tells him off he starts crying lol. In fact it gets to a point where his teddy bear (which btw is filled with ashes of his dead mother) is no longer satisfactory and he needs Yui to fill the loneliness in his little heart. Oh and the reason the bear is filled with his mother’s ashes is after she was killed by Ayato, Kanato burned her body because it made him feel like she finally belongs to him. So after realizing he wants Yui more than the bear, he burns the bear, humps Yui and starts throwing a shitfit at ANYONE who even as much as talks to her. Yui is ok with this because she’s all 萌萌キュン over Kanato but the reason he’s obsessed with her is because she in fact IS his mother. The twist here is, after Ayato killed Cordelia, Richter came around and ripped her heart out and placed it into Yui’s body. (Then Kanato found the corpse and burned it.) On top of this, Cordelia’s got some dark lord super duper power blood running through her body so now that her heart is inside of Yui, Yui is pretty much a power blood bank for the vampires. Since Kanato’s been sucking her blood the entire game, his power level is now over 9000. After multiple threats of killing Yui, forcing her to vow to be his slave, threatening to turn her into a doll, I finally reached the endings Σ(´∀`;). End 3: Kanato can’t stop using Yui as his free soda machine but then he gets jealous thinking everyone is taking her away from him. He then goes batshit, sets everyone on fire and kills them except Yui. Instead he decides to turn her into one of his dolls. (Uguu cage of love -> old & busted. Taxidermy-> new hotness!!)

End 2: Yui becomes the Sakamaki Bicycle and apparently Kanato isn’t man enough for her that she goes around to all the others brothers to get her blood sucked. Kanato is pissed but she says that she only LOVES him and the rest are just carnal desires! To prove her love for him, she kills everyone and he’s like ZOMG BONER and is so happy they go bonking after her glorious massacre. (;´Д`) End 1: Yui is so do-M for Kanato that she spends all day with him, being drugged and forgetting what time it is as she slowly starts turning into a vampire. They then get married and move into the vampie castle together and he promises to give her “human bait” she can suck blood from now that she’s officially been turned into a vampire. Heaven Scenario – This is kind of like an epilogue after Yui becomes a vampire. Kanato’s extremely possessive of Yui and when she brings him a butterfly she found he throws a shitfit because HOW DARE SHE TAKE INTEREST IN SOMETHING OTHER THAN HIM! ┻━┻ ︵ ლ(ಠ益ಠლ) He then figures she needs a REMINDER so he starts sucking her blood again and calling her Yui-SAN sigh. When she gets tired and doesn’t get enough blood he then lets her suck his as well. In the ending Kanato takes Yui to kill her father but she doesn’t remember who he is and kills him without mercy. Oh well Karma bitch, you threw your daughter to a bunch of crazy vampires that’s what u get bro. \(^o^)/ So despite Kanato’s DOUUSHITE yangire rage fests I actually felt so sorry for him I couldn’t hate him. That NTR End 2 had me going OH MY GOD YUI WHY the entire time though. Poor guy always gets NTRed!

Sakamaki Ayato – I think Ayato is best when done first but it wasn’t too bad doing him 2nd. Ayato’s got mommy issues too but rather than being in LOVE with his mom he fucking hates her. In fact he’s the one who killed her in the first place though being incredibly screwed up he sucked her blood to show his power over her. When Ayato was a shota, his mom Cordelia was bent over to get him to be no. 1 and be better than Beatrice’s children (Shuu and Reiji.) She forced him to study and instead of praising his efforts she would constantly berate him. Due to this he got brainwashed in his head that he must always be number 1!!! Needless to say he grew up to be a selfish brat with no consideration for anyone but himself and his own personal gains. He also loves pulling pranks on people and doing twisted shit like Kanato where he pours hot candle wax on Yui, uses her for dart target practice, and puts her on a leash telling her to act like his dog. After a while he becomes well aware that Yui’s blood tastes just like his mother’s and he knows his mother possessed powerful demon blood. He then decides he’ll use Yui to raise his power level over 9000 and be NUMBER ONE ONCE AND FOR ALL /evillaughter.wav. Despite all his abuse, Yui starts to get fond of him as well and gets jealous when he sucks blood of another girl at school. In fact she enjoys having him suck her blood so much she starts coming to him asking him to suck it but he keeps making her wait saying it’ll taste better if he holds back for a few days.

This pretty much brings their relationship to not love but lust and Yui knows this and tells herself that whenever he sucks her blood or they have sex.Ayato gets jealous and possessive of her as well and even when she does as much as help drag Shuu to his room, he gets pissed and immediately its omnomnom time. He even shows off in front of all his brothers and makes out with her at the dining table (though Laito wants to join in as always :lol:). So if Ayato wasn’t enough, suddenly his uncle Richter shows up babbling delusionally that Yui is Cordelia. Ayato tells him to fuck off and that Yui belongs to him now. End 3: Ayato realizes that Yui has his mother’s heart but he doesn’t know why. He then goes nuts, stabs Yui in the heart and says now she’s his forever while sucking blood out of her dead body. (;´Д`) End 2: Ayato tells Yui that he killed his mom and then Richter took the heart and put it into Yui. When Laito and Kanato hear about this they’re like AWW SHIT BRO. Since Cordelia had dark lord blood running through her veins and since Ayato drank a shit ton of it, he became powerful enough to ward off both Kanato & Laito. He then goes and kills everyone and comes back and makes her his blood bank/sex doll forever. (Yui is so broken by this time all she can say is I love you to him in broken sentences.) End 1: Richter bed intrudes into Yui’s room saying he wants her but Ayato stops him saying that Yui’s not Cordelia and she belongs to him now. He kills Richter and his father, and then becomes the vampire leader, marrying Yui. Instead of a wedding ring he bites her finger all around and then they screw while a passerby squirrel watches. :lol:

Heaven Scenario: In the Heaven scenario this time it felt like it maybe happened BEFORE any of the endings or was just kind of a stand alone thing. Yui tells Ayato to stop being a dick and not suck her blood when she’s tired. She pushes him away and he gets pissed and makes her lick her own blood off the floor ==;. So then Shuu, Laito, Subaru and Kanato have a 5P with Yui until Ayato comes and beats them up. Then he goes and screws Yui in his room and becomes more & more obsessed with her. Yui realizes her words won’t reach him so she figures she’ll just let him do what he wants with her body in hopes someday he’ll see the light. Uh no? ( ´_ゝ`) I know Ayato had done a lot of hard living, and I know that his actions are justified to how he was raised BUT I still can’t bring myself to like him. I mean I did feel pity for him during the childhood flashbacks but it’s a totally different feeling than I had with Kanato. It could just be the fact that I don’t like Midorikawa’s voice but even if it was all mothercon, I felt that Kanato loved Yui. It reminded me of how when my cats used to bite me and then lick my hand afterward with Kanato. With Ayato though, it’s just like a rabid dog biting you, then running off victoriously while you lay there in pain. Even Yui knew that their relationship was lust but she still fell in love with him…which is why it made it worse when he became so possessed by the dark lord powers that she knew he was no longer the Ayato she loved. I guess what I’m trying to say is that ultimately, I prefer the yanderes who actually LOVE the heroine but to me Ayato just felt like he wanted to use her to become stronger. Yes he is justified in doing so because that’s what he was drilled into his head, but no I don’t think it’s acceptable and it’s rather off putting for me.

Sakamaki Shuu – I thought Shuu would be this boring log who sleeps all day and does nothing, but he ended up being such a sweetheart. (*´ω`*) Shuu is the oldest brother at age 19 but because he sleeps all day and skips classes he’s been held back several times as a senior. His mother is Beatrice, and he shares a younger brother with her – Reiji. Right off the bat he tells Yui he don’t give no fucks about her or drinking her blood and spends most of his time sleeping on the floor with his music on. He’s actually got a talent for music and can also play the violin. Yui now has to work hard to get his attention by asking him to kiss her or dragging him out half naked from the bathtub to his room so he doesn’t sleep there :lol:. She tries to take interest in understanding him and asks to listen to his music but he gives her random pr0n moaning to listen to instead. xDD His lazyness gets SO bad that she has to start feeding him and dressing him. When the brothers think they can easily get Yui away from Shuu, he actually puts in effort and shows that he really IS the older brother and he’s better than all of them (such as beating them all at a game of pool.) To get away from his younger siblings he decides to live in some abandoned shack for a week and terrified of said siblings, Yui decides to join him. (Well let’s face it he’s a lot safer by doing nothing than the others are.) So anyway this whole “take care of me I’m too lazy” thing continues until one day Yui is cooking some food for herself. A bored Shuu strolls into the kitchen and starts getting in the way until she turns the stove on. The fire at the stove scares him, and then in panic he grabs Yui and kisses her telling her to never use that stove again. In addition to this, Cordelia’s blood starts surfacing in Yui causing her to become incredibly aroused around Shuu (and he notices and calls her a pervert and a harlot xDD).

So the deal with the fire is, in the past Shuu was pretty much raised at home and never went out so he didn’t know much of the outside world since he was a vampire. One day he decided to go out and he met a human boy named Edgar. He and Edgar became bffs until one day there was a fire in Edgar’s village. Edgar said he has to save his family and he ran into the fire with Shuu crying for him to stop. Needless to say Edgar died leaving Shuu feeling useless and if that wasn’t bad enough, fucking turdbag Reiji was like “lol you’re a useless turd who don’t deserve to be the next heir after daddy.” After losing his first & last friend, Shuu kinda stopped giving a shit about life and he doesn’t care if he dies anytime. This was just as Keikaku for Reiji so he could pretty much take over all the responsibilities of the older son so he would be seen as the next appropriate heir. Since Yui is now the 2nd human in his life, Shuu keeps trying to push her away by scaring her and calling her names but despite all this Yui stayed by his side and he’s now fallen in love with her. This of course works out because Yui loves Shuu too and thanks to Cordelia’s dark lord blood she wants to screw him 24/7 OOOHHH YEAAA (︶.̮︶✽)イヤン. End 3: Shuu found Reiji’s diary from 10 years ago where he said that he’s the one who burned down Edgar’s village. They go outside on the balcony to have a sword fight and even though Shuu stabs Reiji, when he isn’t paying attention Reiji manages to get up and stab Shuu and the 2 of them die. The other 4 brothers are like “welp time for school” leaving Yui crying over Shuu’s body ;_;. End 2: Reiji goes insane with jealousy over Shuu and says that Shuu’s taking everything away from him bawww. He then decides that the only way to solve this problem is to kill Yui and runs after her with a sword. ( ≖Д≖;) He kills her and then Shuu runs up and finds her dying and cries over her body. Just then Reiji adds on to his dickery by telling Shuu that he burned down Edgar’s village.

Shuu gets extremely pissed and kills Reiji then cries over Yui’s body. Suddenly he hears her heart beat so he gives her some of his blood to drink and revives her – as she has now awakened her vampire self. A year later he becomes the Vampire King and kills his dad & uncle. The other brothers decide not go against him. End 1: Shuu and Yui decide to abandon the vampires and live elsewhere. He only needs her blood so they plan to go someplace without other vampires and there won’t be risk of them getting caught. For money, Shuu decides to sell an old necklace passed down from his mother which is worth enough money to last them 100 years or something. And so they live happily (?) ever after like hobos in the woods. I mean is this the best end? Cause I prefer ending 2 since at least Shuu is king and Reiji the dickwad is dead! :lol: Heaven Scenario: Yui and Shuu are raburabu but Reiji can’t get that 40 foot pole out of his ass so he abducts Yui into his room and whips her. ( ´_ゝ`) Shuu beats him up and saves her and then go back to his room to suck blood and screw. They then get randy and skip classes humping on the roof the next day. In no3, Laito comes in saying he can please Yui more and Shuu’s like “do whatever you want.” When Laito goes for it Shuu then gets jelly and says “pft little boy step aside” and gives Yui her orgasm face. Laito’s like (*´Д`)/ヽァ/ヽァ and admits defeat :lol:. In the epilogue Shuu tells Yui to take responsibility for pulling his heart out of hell ever since the day his friend died. DAwww SHUUU BABY U SO PRECIOUSSSS (*´Д`*)ポポンッ. I was surprised at how much I liked Shuu. Maybe it’s because he actually loved her and didn’t see her as a replacement or an object of power, what a concept! Though unfortunately, Shuu’s route made me want to fork Reiji in the face.

Sakamaki Reiji – Reiji is a fucking douche spawned on the day of the douche when the douche planets aligned atop of douchebag mountain. He is such a huge dick he puts that giant bronze dick statue at the Amsterdam Sex museum to shame. He’s like the BDSM Drill Army Sergeant and his entire route is just an excuse for BDSM lulz. Unlike the 3 brothers above who actually had a story justifying their actions, Reiji has no story. His story is he’s a douchebag with an inferiority complex and an obsession with materialistic things. Fortunately, to help move things along they pretty much shoved the entire Cordelia/Yui plot in this route. I guess partially I could say this might have been best saved for last but since there’s so much dickery going on, it would probably leave a bad aftertaste so I’m glad I kinda shoved it into the middle. So since Reiji had his inferiority complex for Shuu and their mother Beatrix preferred Shuu over Reiji…Reiji hired a vampire hunter to kill Beatrix. Unfortunately things didn’t go JUST as keikaku because Beatrix died happy saying she was finally freed from the torment of Cordelia. Reiji’s like (# ゚Д゚)NOO DAMNIT BIATCH U SUPPOSED TO DIE SUFFERING GRR. So ever since that day this crazy son of a bitch has been working on a drug to REVIVE THE DEAD JUST SO HE COULD FUCKING KILL HER AGAIN. Wow someone needs a new hobby like maybe stamp collecting. To add the twist to this story, the vampire hunter who killed Beatrix was Yui’s father – BUT WAIT there’s more! Richter then shows up and reveals that Yui’s father is not her real father and in fact she was just some thrown away baby. And so 17 years ago after Ayato killed Cordelia, as she was dying in Richter’s arms she said “it ain’t over yet honey” and told him to rip her heart out and place it into another body. And so I guess Richter just happened to find baby Yui lying around and he magically placed Cordelia’s heart inside of her.

Sooo after taking a whipping, a strangling and being a lab rat for various Reiji drugs, the Cordelia inside of Yui has HAD ENOUGH OF HIS SHIT. Apparently even though she’s been quiet all this time, she has been able to observe Yui growing up (so wow that means everytime Yui screws the other brothers Cordelia’s like <●><●> inside of her ( ゚∀゚)ァハハ八八ノヽノヽノヽノ \ / \/ \). So she tells Yui to KILL BEFORE YOU ARE KILLED. Finally Yui manages to push Reiji away from herself and this triggers Cordelia to fully come out and take over Yui’s body. Now Yui becomes the peanut gallery and observes as Cordelia does whatever the fuck she pleases. Richter’s like yippie yay that Cordelia is back and he don’t care that he’s being a huge pedo because she’s in a 17 year old’s body :lol:. Apparently he wanted to marry Cordelia but instead she married his older brother Karl Heinz  (who he then took the name Sakamaki Tougo for Japanese registration purposes)and had the triplets. Karl was only interested in her for her demon powers but she was actually in love with him, and loved him even though he hated her. Needless to say it’s quite obvious why she never gave a fuck about her children except to make herself look good. She also had planned this whole thing out for Yui to come to the Sakamaki house as a sacrificial bride so Yui being here is ALL JUST AS KEIKAKU! Here’s where it becomes SWEET REVENGE. Cordelia is a 女王さま and she will NOT TAKE REIJI’S SHIT LAWL. In fact she threatens to do physical harm to Yui’s body and Reiji’s like GRR I WILL NOT HAVE THIS so he pretty much becomes Cordelia’s slave when she’s “bored”. She breaks his dishes, makes him screw her, pretends to drink poison and spills hot tea on herself just to test how much Reiji cares about her. Reiji becomes extremely do-M (cause clearly all these do-S types just wanna be dominated) and does everything she says. At one point when Yui is able to gain brief control of her body (after almost drowning in the lake) she asks why Reiji goes so far for her and he’s like “lol idk.” At a ball Reiji kisses Corde-yui and passes a medicine to pretty much get rid of her. He explains he failed to complete the medicine to bring back the dead but he succeeded in sending the dead souls back to where they belong.

End 3: Yui’s will loses to Cordelia’s will and she takes over completely. Richter thinks they can live lovelove ever after until she’s like LAWL YOUR DICK DOES NOT SATISFY ME LIKE KARL’S OOHOHOHO and she leaves the poor guy hanging. Also Reiji’s been killed by Richter lmao, Cordelia – 1, everyone else – 0 ww. End 1: Yui wins over Cordelia and gets all raburabu with Reiji. He sucks her blood and kisses her saying that she’s his slave forever and she’s like OH YESS I LOVE BEING YOUR SLAVE BABY TAKE ME. The end. o_O End 2: BEST END where Reiji becomes Yui’s slave and she becomes 女王さま~xDDD. Cordelia’s gone but I guess Yui inherited her strength and personality anyway. She tells Reiji he better do as he says or he won’t get her blood and she’ll THROW him away bwahahaha. SWEET GLORIOUS REVENGE キタ━ヽ(∀゚ )人(゚∀゚)人( ゚∀)人(∀゚ )人(゚∀゚)人( ゚∀)ノ━!! Unfortunately Yui turned into a disgusting do-M in the Heaven scenario where basically she’d be like “oh god Reiji WHIP ME MOAR (:.;゚;Д;゚;.:)ハァハァ~”. He not only whipped her but he also then got bitchy and locked her in her room for a few days without food just because she BUMPED into Shuu. ( ´_ゝ`) Despite all this she just begs him not to leave her because she’s now pretty much his punching bag of love. Blah if Reiji’s personality wasn’t disgusting enough, during his blood sucking scenes he sounded like he was hockin’ up a big ol’ loog. Like seriously get the guy some Mucinex cause he’s not sucking blood he’s coughing up snot into Yui instead Σ(゚д゚lll)ガーン. Reiji’s entire route was pretty much balls. I may have forgiven him if he had a back story of some sort but the entire route ended up being about BDSM fetishes and how much of a whore Cordelia is because she can’t get enough ara dicks desuwa. Also I guess this means that the sakamaki brothers aren’t their real ages either. Like they may “look” 17 or 19 or whatnot but they are clearly much older, seeing how when Cordelia died they were probably at least 5-6 years old and Yui was a baby when the heart was transferred. Also I learned that Carl picked his Japanese name because he liked ketchup. :lol:

Sakamaki Laito – Laito you motherfucker! :lol: It’s funny from the CDs I liked Laito. Yes he has his weird sexual fetishes but I guess the game decided to ESCALATE them beyond my tolerance. I mean he even has such a cute hobby as crossword puzzles! The problem with Laito is he is do-S and do-M at the same time. So here he goes all do-M and I’m like (✧≖‿ゝ≖) but then the next moment he goes bipolar-chan and becomes disgustingly do-S. Not how Reiji and Ayato were cruel but Laito is just DISGUSTING man. I mean it’s no shocker that he was gonna have issues being the son of that super-slut Cordelia but I guess Rejet/Otomate decided to CROSS THAT LINE! The only time Laito is funny is when he does stuff like make Yui read 50 Shades of Gray in the library but otherwise it’s nasty. He says at first that he’s not into hurting girls like his brothers, but THIS IS ALL A LIE. The biggest problem starts with the fact that LAITO FUCKED HIS MOM YEA. THIS IS A PROBLEM. And it’s not that he fucked he because he had a mothercon, it’s because she’s a fucking cock craving milf who doesn’t get satisfied by Karl’s dick, or Karl’s brother’s dick so she has to go for Karl’s SON’S DICK. Unfortunately for Laito, his mom’s a big ol’ slut so since he was just growing up he thought that she loved him rather than used him as dick #3298352. He got jealous of all the men she screwed and he would kill them all, but she told him to never kill Richter because he could be of “use” to her. When Karl found out that his wife & son were humping, he locked up Laito in the basement prison and when Cordelia came to see him, what does she do? She fucks Richter in front of Laito and all of this now turns Laito’s inner pain into…pleasure. (ಠ_ಠ) So yea thanks to her sluttyness it became contagious and it turned Laito into a sexual deviant. (If only Laito had a stuffed animal like Kanato for therapy!) So then one day when Ayato went and attacked Cordelia sucking her blood, she ran to Laito for help. Instead of going “save me Laito” she went “Protect me Laito, I need to fuck Karl!” Laito probably reached his breaking point by then so he took her and threw her over the balcony into the rose garden. Cue Richter ripping her heart out followed by Kanato burning her body.  From that day Laito said Cordelia was “dead” to him and that killing the one you love is the best form of love confession in the vampire world or something. ヽ(。_゜)ノ

So this is where I’m like NO. First of all the entire time he tastes Cordelia’s blood in Yui, he tries to then turn Yui into Cordelia. He goes as far as having her wear Cordelia’s dress and it drives Yui crazy that she’s just a replacement for him. That is until she becomes so do-M for him that she doesn’t even care if their romance is “abnormal”.  She gets so horribly upset at everything he does that she actually does attempt to kill herself but fails the first time by falling for Laito’s sweet words when he calls her Yui instead of bitch-chan. Second time she fails by trying to get drugs from Reiji but Reiji tricks her of course and gives her some medicine that makes her horny lol. To end it with a bang, he then decides to screw Yui right in front of Cordelia’s grave. How romantic! Eventually Cordelia gains enough momentum to start speaking to Yui’s mind because Yui starts to slowly awaken as a vampire. In End 3, Laito kills Karl thanks to the fact that Yui has awakened as a vampire. Cordelia manages to fully take over Yui’s body saying she’s gonna ask Reiji to go revive Karl for her, despite knowing that Karl hates her. Laito ain’t having any of this so he kills Cordelia/Yui. He asks Yui if she has any last requests and she asks him for a kiss. He kisses her with the final words “Farewell bitch-chan.” Oh how sweet of you. In End 1, Laito kills Karl again and Yui says to herself that she will never tell Laito that he got the same powers Karl did (thanks to Cordelia). Cordelia inside bitches that she’ll take over Yui one day and kill Laito because he killed Karl. Yui’s like lawl its you who killed Karl since it was your blood who powered Laito  and Cordelia rages. Laito then picks up Yui princess style and carries her saying he loves her and shes like lol no u dont but hes like but you still like me saying that (✧≖‿ゝ≖). They make out and pretend to “vow to love each other” like at a wedding ceremony. Yui tells him if he ever loves someone other than her, to kill her or she’ll go insane (aka most likely Cordelia will take over).

End 2: Laito kills karl ….again…and takes over the Sakamaki house. He’s hes so excited he could orgasm! So then he gets his tsukaima to attack Yui and his tsukaima were his brides in the past who he rejected…( ≖Д≖;)  He then gets tired of seeing them attacking her so he kills all of them. He then gets turned on cause Yui’s covered in their blood as he pushes her on the floor and screws her. WOW SUCH…LOVELY ENDINGS. The Heaven scenario has Yui already a vampire and she’s slowly getting used to her new life. She starts getting thirsty for blood so Laito lets her suck his blood and he realizes WHAT PLEASURE IT IS TO GET YOUR BLOOD SUCKED. He like orgasms as Yui sucks his blood going “gee I shoulda done this earlier!” Then his NTR fetish returns with a vengence when he purposely loses a game of chess to get Kanato & Ayato to suck Yui’s blood in front of him..until the 2 realize they’re being used as Laito-Fap-Material. Needless to say they drop Yui like a log and walk out saying they will punish Laito for this later. (Though at this point anything they do to him will probably make him jizz his pants.) So then the sexual deviancy escalates as Laito and Yui are in the tub as he slices up parts of her body with a knife and sucks blood from them. He then goes “I know you’re such a do-M so you LOVE it when I do this.” Wow I’m so glad I never mary-sue project myself into otome game heroines. (ಠ_ಠ) In the epilogue he babbles how since it’s a full moon again, he wants to go screwing in the sky as they fly~. Yea you do that Laito-chan. The route was a huge info dump though and explained that Yui was given as a sacrificial bride to the Sakamaki household by the church and this is something they have been doing for years. This is why when Yui tried to run away and call for help, the church people were like “omg don’t call here” and hung up on her. Additionally I disliked Ayato as it is, but having Ayato NTR Yui voluntarily was rather disgusting. I shoulda seen it coming seeing how these 2 tried to do this in Kanato’s route as well. Sigh, poor girl. Needless to say Laito made me realize that it’s not sexual deviants I like, it’s puchi-ero (slightly perverted) characters that I like. I also like do-M’s. So like in the heaven scenario when Yui sucked his blood and he moans = yea that was awesome. But making him NTR her, rape her and slice her up with a knife = (#゚ω゚ ) お断りだぜぇ. I almost had dejavu of this with Ace’s route in the Alice series. Fortunately thanks to this game, no matter what Ace does it will never compare to the horrid shit that Laito did.

Sakamaki Subaru – SUBARU IS MY BAAAAABYYYY and I’m not just saying that because he’s the youngest of the bunch. Subaru’s route, is the most otome-tic route of the game, probably even more than Shuu’s. He’s kinda like when a cat bites you then immediately licks the area it bit to show affection. Subaru will act violent and break shit, then the moment he notices Yui is hurt he will hug her and kiss her and lick her wounds. 萌ぇぇ(*´Д`*)ポポンッ Subaru unfortunately was raised in a screwed up fashion too but the problem here for once isn’t Cordelia but his father Karl. Karl basically took Subaru’s mother Christa, forced her to become his bride, raped her and made her have a child. Unlike the other 2 moms (or Cordelia who just loves all sorts of dick) Christa never wanted any of this shit to happen. So here she is forced to pretty much have a rape baby while she deals with PTSD from the rape. She’s asked Subaru many times to kill her and even gave him a silver knife (which can kill vampires.) Subaru’s held on to this knife for years but could never bring himself to kill his own mother. Due to his mother’s blood curdling screams (and man did I need to take my headphones every time she came on screen) the poor child took out his frustration with violence and breaking things. Despite this though, Subaru is gentle and caring on the inside just like his mother once was so he can never bring himself to truly hurt Yui. Being the younger vampire, Subaru still can’t handle his vampire PMS so during the full moon he goes nuts but he does warn Yui to stay away. Yui of course is so in love with him since he’s like the only one so far that truly gave a fuck about her that she refuses to leave his side. (*´∀`)

He warns her that he’ll rape her and “change the taste of her blood” but the moment he notices that her back is injured from some broken glass he starts licking it off to make sure she’s okay. 糞萌ええええええ(*´Д`*)ポポンッ He starts getting extremely tsundere around her and when she checks to make sure his wounds are ok, he blushes like a tomato x333. He even holds back his blood sucking and tries to get away so he isn’t tempted but Yui just can’t stay away from this precious baby. Eventually they both realize how much they love each other and when she comes into his room one night he’s like ITS SEXY TIME. Yui’s like “oh okay /puts out” an Subaru’s like (・_・) but she’s all like it’s ok if its you Subaru bby. And so they have some actual romantic sex in his coffin and the following night Subaru goes off to kill his mother to “free her” from all the suffering. Before going off though, he kisses Yui goodbye. ( ;∀;) End 3: Subaru dies and Yui cries in despair. Suddenly BAM our favorite whore Cordelia comes out and says she’ll give Yui the powers to take revenge. Yui realized Subaru didn’t want Yui to be taken over by Cordelia so she takes the silver knife he left her and stabs herself in the heart. (◞‸ლ) End 2: Subaru and Yui run away from the castle together. He’s killed his mother in order to “free her” from her suffering. Subaru gets pissed that the best he can do is free his mother and he’s not strong enough to stand up to his father. Yui tells Subaru to stop holding back and drink her blood so he can gain the power he needs. He agrees to drink her blood on the condition that he will never drink anyone else’s ever again.

End 1: Subaru kills his mother again and Shuu tells him he has to leave the house for killing one of the family. (I don’t get why this suddenly matters when the triplets killed Cordelia but OKAY.) He tells Yui that he loves her and he wants her to “live the same time as him” by becoming a vampire with him. Heaven: Subaru saves Yui from being 2ped by Ayato & Laito and tells the 2 mansluts to GTFO. The next day before school she tries to get him out of his coffin, but he pulls her in and does randy stuff together while they ignore Reiji. The following morning sick Subaru comes into her room so she lets him rest on her bed. He asks for Yui’s blood and tells her to get on top of him because he can barely move. (✧≖‿ゝ≖) Turns out it was all an act so he could get her to get on top of him and strip her clothes off www. He then tells her he sucked too much by accident and says she can suck some of his in return since she’s gonna be a vampire soon anyway. In the epilogue he tells Yui that he won’t let her get hurt and he’ll always save her. (*´ω`*) He then takes her to his room for some sexy time. イヤアアアアアアンンンンスバルん萌えぇぇぇ(*´ェ`*)ポッ!!! Ok ok I loved Shuu and all and he’s quite the エロい one but SUBARU oh my god SO CUTE dat Tsunbaru….hands down best character in the game. Also the best character to end the game with cause god forbid I left Laito or Reiji for last :shock:.

SUBARU MOEEEEEE. CORDELIA IS A DIRTY SLUT. KARL YOU’RE A DOUCHE. Okay that’s not my final thought but daymn I walked into this game liking characters I ended up hating and and not caring for characters I ended up loving :lol: Despite all the weird, twisted and guro shit the game was interesting. Let’s face it it was “INTERESTING”. It’s a game you’ve never played before and it’s like 3 steps up after Gekka Ryoran Romance. It goes to show you that not all vampires are sparkling abstinent bishies. They are vampires, they are hungry for blood and lust and that’s just how it is. It also goes to show that when someone is messed up in the head, they are permanently messed up in the head. Miss Mary Sue isn’t gonna just walk in and magically heal their wounded heart. Nope, she’s gonna have to change herself to be able to deal with their shit, do or die. Before playing the game and only reading screencap scenario I found Yui annoying but after playing the game I think she has some balls going for her. To be able to take some of the shit she took….it’s really a shocker she didn’t try to kill herself in every route. Yes there are a lot of stuff Rejet didn’t touch upon and some things COULD have been wrapped up a bit better but overall I think the game story and atmosphere got its message across. Despite the art being nice, some of the CGs looked pretty awkward. In fact the CGs weren’t even the parts I actually enjoyed. The biggest hook for me was the dummy head mic and the huge reason I bought this game. I have no regrets. The seiyuus all do a great job (zomg Kaji Yuki you sexy beast.) My blood sucking voice ranking is kanato > shuu > laito > subaru > ayato > reiji. I’m sorry Konitan you sounded like you were coughing up a hairball. For play order, I would recommend Kanato, Ayato, Laito, Reiji, Shuu, Subaru. This order basically unravels the story with all the crazies and then lets you enjoy some actual otome gaming romance. Now if you care about plot over romance and want to unravel the story for the end then play it as Kanato, Subaru, Shuu, Ayato, Reiji, Laito. I do warn you that playing the story way is gonna leave a VERY VERY awkward aftertaste because the story unravels from good → horrific. As always Rejet’s music was awesome but I kinda hate how whenever you’d finish an ending, you’d have to start from the beginning and force skip through all the intros. I mean I already did the damn intro why is there no direct path to character select?? Yea that part was kind of annoying. If Otomate/Rejet decide to release a fandisk for this game with more romance (and less Cordelia) then I will surely buy. I found sometimes the character personalities in other people’s routes were better than when I did their own. It was kinda like “hey Laito you’re such a randy cutie in Shuu’s route dafuq is wrong with you in your own ==;.” My favorite characters ended up being Subaru, Shuu and Kanato in that order. I was surprised I liked Kanato lmao but then similarly I was shocked how much disgusted Laito made me orz. I never really cared for Ayato or Reiji but both of them were rather unpleasant (though Reiji’s route was entertaining sweet revenge.) Anyway if you can stomach blood, guro and violence, and you love psychoanalysis stuff then definitely play this game. Now that I’ve played Diabolik Lovers I guess I can’t use “violence and guro” as an excuse to stay away from Black Wolves Saga :lol:.

DIABOLIK LOVERS Regular Edition / Game

About Hinano

Juggling free time between otome games & FFXIV! (;・∀・)

Posted on October 26, 2012, in Otome Games and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 61 Comments.

  1. Actually, in Subaru’s 1st End, he also kill their father. THAT’S the main problem ^^

    • oh? I didn’t catch who he killed so I just assumed it was the mom but yea I guess killing the dad makes sense too…..though it doesn’t make sense in a way where “hey wait Laito killed his dad like in every end and nobody gave a fuck??” lol

  2. Filed under: Games That Will Never Receive an Official US Localization (along with every other otome game, but hey, I think this one would be ranked among the top of the non R-18 selection)

    I think many people have a morbid fascination with dysfunctional family drama, so it was interesting to read your summary. Or maybe I’m just trying to rationalize the feelings I had of, “Man, I wish I had played the game myself to watch the plot unravel firsthand.”

    • yea that’s why shows like Maurry or Jerry Springer are popular. Everyone of the triplets would be a great candidate for this lmao.
      of course this game won’t receive official US localization. I think the hakuoki thing was just a 1 time thing with Aksys to be honest (though the way they handled it I would never want them laying a finger on this one.)

  3. I have played 4 routes and my favorite is Shuu>>>>>Subaru>Reiji>Ayato.

    Ahhhhhh I can’t describe my feeling for Shuu, I love him!! He seem to upgrade his エロイ compared with drama cd (*´▽`*).I like the scene that Yui give Shuu hair washing(I don’t sure, my Japanese skill isn’t good).Shuu, where are you touching (*´艸`*)?. I like the ED2 than ED1. ED2 is the best ending for me.Subaru is cute but I love Shuu more than him a lot.

    I want to punch the slut Cordelia and the stupid Richter.They REALLY suit together.

    At first I think I will not play Kanato and Laito route.But after reading your review, I think I would change my mind and try Kanato’s route.But Laito…..he’s too creepy for me.I never like him.I’m scared of him T______T

    About sucking blood, Reiji’s sucking voice makes me laugh.Reiji…. Are there something in your throat?? LOL.

    • lol well I liked Shuu but I Didn’t think his route was THAT much better than Subaru? Maybe because Subaru always felt bad if he hurt her but Shuu didn’t care that he almost dropped her on a spiked chair in the torture chamber e_e;; But overall I enjoyed both Shuu & Tsunbaru ;)

      Laito’s route is like :) and then :( over and over like a really bad rollercoaster

      • Subaru’s route is the most romactic in the game .But I like Shuu both in drama cd and game.Maybe I’m not fan of Tsundere boy like Tsunbaru.But I still think Subaru is cute especially in the epilogue ≖‿≖ (finally they done it)

  4. Wow, those Laito ends, they’re all terrible. Reiji’s weren’t too bad though, it seems Cordelia was a godsend in that route for once.

    Otherwise nothing else to add I didn’t say in the chat. This is an extremely fun game, but it seems like I’ll never like the CDs since a lot of characters like Kanato and Shuu seem worse in there. A FD seems unlikely, and I’m rather happy about that since we know how otomate and FDs go nowadays.

    But like all of this was Cero C, how?? I know I’ve said this x1000 times but I’m so scared for Cero D BWS. I hope it’s because it ALSO has randy moments now, because Kaiji Yuuki panting as Rath in that game was so hot. I’d go through a thousand tortures to hear him like that again!

    • Yes all of Laito’s ends were terribad sigh. Probably worst ends in the entire game. Reiji’s ends were better yet but thanks to the whore xD;

      I think as far as CDs go Subaru’s are probably the most consistent ones. It shoulda been Cero D I mean they had that Yui bra sprite

  5. Did Richter have a route too?

  6. I was sooooo looking forward to this game as I’m a fan of dark stuffs.

    Having read your review, I’m happy I decided to get myself this one. “Interesting” might be the right word as you put it. I’d love to see dimensions in otome game’s characterization. Its dynamic development (from your review so far) is rational, putting psychoanalytical stuffs in. I thought I was in a psychology class or something. lol

    Aw. What a shame I’m now getting stuck abroad. Thanks to the delayed release, my plan got screwed up. The Sakamaki boys must have been crazy to come out at the post office for weeks. I only hope they won’t be sent back to Japan.

    • I’m usually not a fan of this kind of stuff so I bought it mostly for the dummy mic thing xD:;
      But yes very psychologically written so I’m sure you’ll enjoy it!

  7. SHUU. AND TSUNBARU. I CAN’T. I love them both so much. I can’t choose. Kanato was interesting lol when I played his route. I love Kaji Yuki’s voice dammit. Konitan doesn’t do good lewd noises lol he sounds like he’s choking on something. I fucking hated Reiji so much D':

    Also, there’s that one Tsunbaru and Yui CG where Yui’s boobs looks GINORMOUS (in the dancing one). Is it just me?

    • Shuu and Tsunbaru are the best ;3;3;3; I never thought I’d like Shuu this much though I’ve liked Subaru ever since I heard his CD xD. I was afraid Kaji was gonna scream in my ear with his high pitched voice but it was actually surprisingly deep ;) I didn’t notice the big boobs on Yui I think it’s just the way her ribbon was flying ?

  8. Was NOT expecting you like Kanato at all. 8D
    Subaru is such a sweetie dkjlgfgb. I felt that he liked the heroine the most in the game. And thanks so much for this post. I had a lot of fun reading it and blah.

    And from your last couple of sentences, I take that you’ll be picking up BWS?

    • I wasn’t expecting either! I think it’s the power of Kaji Yuki’s peropero xDDD
      Subaru is a darling yes ;) And yea you’re right he pretty much was the “otome game route” of the game lmao

      And nah I don’t think I’ll be bothering with BWS. The dummy head mic is what helped me get through this game and since BWS doesn’t have that feature I’m not sure if I can stand to sit through it.

  9. touchofobscurity

    Better then Gekka Ryouran Romance you say? I actually liked the darkness in Gekka, other then they made oniichan the scapegoat for all the insanity. Also like it too that they do vampires ‘correctly’. As dark screwed up entities that can’t really be redeemed in most situations. Especially not faggy sparkling idiots.

    In another light, I like the idea of this game. It’s nice change to see a different take on the genre. Not just fantasy special princesses or high school romances. Since you have to admit, be it for better or worse, these are characters not done often when it comes to otome.

    • I think in this one the scapegoat was the triplets mom but rather than being a scapegoat it really WAS her fault for the most part (and if not her then the dumb manslut dad lol) When I think back to Gekka I’m like dayum it wasn’t nearly as bad as this lmao. And I agree about the sparkling faggots, this felt a lot more “realistic” to what vampires might be like lol

  10. Uggh this is way worse in comparison to black wolves. Heck the cat twins are almost saints compared to some of these vampires. I dunno if I can stomach guro but it does have me curious.

    • There’s nothing visually guro (except a few cgs) so for the most part its ‘use your imagination” and my imagination can get pretty vivid lol

  11. Here’s the main questions that must be asked.
    Hinano-san, was the hype for this game worth the wait? Cuz i honestly have no idea…

    • I’d go with yes. It was SHOCKING in some routes that I never expected but the dummy head mic (which was its winning feature) was definitely good.

  12. Thanks for the review! I guess I’m happy that I didn’t take an interest in the series since I don’t think it’s up my alley. But I admit that I am curious about Kaji’s voice acting from your descriptions since he’s a bias of mine haha. Don’t mind if I go sneak into your past broadcasts. :3

  13. Ahmagawdz! You actually cleared this game! Alas, I ain’t brave enough to even dare. Thanks to this review, I won’t have to wonder about this game no mo (^v^). So I guess Yui, as the heroine, has an If-you-can’t-beat/heal-them-join-them motto going on for her. That ain’t a bad way to look at this game, hmm-hmm…..Darn it, I’m kinda curious about Shuu now

    • I mean it’s a pretty natural motto to have. She DID try to kill herself in Laito’s route but then gave up going “meh screw it I’ll just have to become a wacko like him lol” You can always check out my broadcast replays if you’re curious xD

  14. So you finished the “dark challenge” already. :D

    “Interesting” perfect to describe DiaLovers. We all knew that it would turn out like Gekka Ryouran, since Otomate/Rejet collabs are always kind of crazy, but they still managed to shock us with psychological and physical abuse. That’s Rejet for you. LOL

    Does Ayato love Yui? I think he does, but he doesn’t know how to show his affection, since he was brought up in such a horrible way. Maybe he is showing his affection through the fact that he’s only “devoted” to her.
    So yeah, Subaru, Shuu and maybe Kanato are the most normal ones, I guess? I feel so sorry for Subaru’s mom. She looks so fragile and nice… KARL, YOU DICK!! ┻━┻ ︵ ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)

    That’s not a justification for Cordelia, but…
    Maybe she is just screwing around, because she feels “loved” when she does it with Richter or Laito. I mean they actually have feelings for her unlike Carl, who despises her. So her slut-act could be a self-defense to protect her heart from falling apart?

    Oh yeah, I wouldn’t have thought that Raito would admit defeat to Shuu when it comes to pleasing Yui. xD

    I think I’m forever shocked from this game, because I entered your broadcast, when Raito screwed Cordelia… o.O I don’t know how THIS is only CERO C…

    • I expected wackiness and they exceeded my expectations so props to them I guess? XD Yea I think all the triplets love Yui in their own way but I guess it’s a matter of what I can stomach or not lol. Yea Mr. Ketchup is a douche so its not shocking when u got douche dad + slut mom = messed up triplets

      From what I understand she only really feels like Karl is her “true one” while both Laito & Richter are just her dildos. Hahaha you have such impeccable timing! XD;

  15. Ultimately I still don’t understand the appeal of games and stories like this. I always feel as if they are romanticizing, idealizing, and even making excuses for violence, abuse, and general whatthefuckery in relationships. Do I have the wrong impression of it?

    • no your impression is pretty spot on lol.
      I guess for me at least it was like watching an episode of jerry springer: its a trainwreck but you just can’t look away!
      My favorite characters were the least abusive ones btw lol. I think the appeal of this game particularly are the dummy head mic parts…i think without that it would have been difficult (at least for me) to sit through. I often had to step outside the box and be like “oh i love the way xx seiyuu sounds here” rather than “i love this way this rapist abuser asswipe is whispering in my ear”

      • lol your view of it seems pretty reasonable. I suppose with things like this (or Twilight/50 Shades for that matter) I always just worry about people who think this is how relationships work and that it’s romantic or whatever. It kinda makes me mourn for humanity lmao

  16. I think the only reason why Diabolik lovers isn’t +18, is cause they didn’t put CG of Sex scenes .___. , (keeping aside the horny moans and bloodsucking).

    Anyways this game is too interesting, the first time you see it or hear about it is “meeeh vampires and romance, it will end something like twilight meeeeh D8″ and then you’re on it is like “o__o but what the heck is this…” -> “oh god o,o…” -> “OH MY GOD!!!” -> “D: WHAT KIND OF STORY IS THIS” -> “*trauma* ;_;” (that happened to me with hatoful boyfriend, i thought it will be something funny to play… but… it wasn’t at the end e_e;;).

    I hope Reject make more stuff of DL, like they did with BWS: Last hope, by the way….I feel weird with the fact that i liked a lot Diabolik Lovers even knowing how insane the majority of the characters are, (Stockholm syndrome according to the DL fandom of tumblr o_o;;).
    I loved Subaru (Tsubaru x3!) too!! Shuu gives me some creeps after i heard the versus (the way he used his knife ;_; *fear*) but he’s a calm dude, Ayato …. idk why but i like him *orz x 2 combo* call me Do-M if you want D: , Kanato cuz’ i love shotas but … *excaliburfaceplz* his screams and cry-baby moments *asdfghj ò__ó!* , Raito no comments…. Reiji… troll like a douche-sir.

    (sorry if i made some grammatical mistakes, i’m not an english speaker >,<U)

    • for a Cero C game I think we still should have gotten shirtless sprites for all those multitude of bathroom scenes lol

      and yea I had the same feeling as you xD: I thought I was used to everything but guess not lol
      Last Hope is CEro D so I’m sure they’re going to go all out :lol:

      Also I feel like the CDs are kinda different than the game so I tend to canonize the game over them XP

  17. “Now that I’ve played Diabolik Lovers I guess I can’t use “violence and guro” as an excuse to stay away from Black Wolves Saga”
    If your review is even half as funny as this one I say go for it. XD

    Also that translation wiki is great, I can’t actually think of any otome games with translations aside from oelvn and starry sky, so thank you for sharing.

  18. Oh yeah, does anyone know who is voicing Richter? HIs voice sounds so familiar, but I can’t match it…

    I can’t help but feel very sorry for Richter… Especially in Reiji’s last ending, where Cordelia just leaves him, after everything he did for her… Poor guy, why did you fall in LOVE with this slut?!

    • I had his name somewhere but I lost it. It was nobody important some random guy. Yea Cordelia fucked everyone over, literally xD

      • Hmm… that’s sad.. I really liked Richter’s voice and would like to hear some more of it, if he’d be in some anime or whatever.

        It would be nice if we could get a route with Richter… /bricked I mean he fits in this psychotic world, since he’s extremely obsessed with Cordelia. LOL

  19. THIS GAME. GOOD LORD. Here I am trying to be a good student then I just haaaad to get this game and I just haaaad to start it and “one more chapter” ended up turning into “full nighters” then I would have to get up for work at eight in the morning then go for a full set of classes…. Oh god lol DIS GAME. I can’t stop playing even if I want to! And I agree, the game was definitely interesting in the premise which really caught me and oh yeah dummy head mics and blood sucking sex driven vampires ehhhh I can’t really resist LOL.

    As for the whole twisted aspect, I suppose it doesn’t bother me as much as it probably should but since it’s a game I guess that’s how it is, ya know? Lol anyways I didn’t read the actual routes cause I wanna save some of this stuff for mah self but ;D your final thoughts were highly amusing hahaha “CORDELIA IS A DIRTY SLUT” that reminds me, earlier today I was yelling about how the person who stole my wallet (I got it stolen today T_T) was a dirty whore. Lol yeah that was random but w/e haha I can’t wait to finish this game *_* someday hopefully lol.

    • yea you don’t wanna spoil so good thing you didn’t read the above xD Feel free to come back and read it when you’re done for a good laugh :lol:

      i couldn’t stop playing it either haha I was so pissed when the game was delayed by 4 days in arriving to me ;A; I think I will only use EMS from now on >:T

      • Yeah I’ll definitely come back for a good laugh after I’m done with the game xD
        I’m slowly ploughing through it, I would probably be done by now but you know how school is… it eats your life away LOL. (esp since I’m pre-med `-` hurgh… no time)
        And yeah EMS is the way to go! >o< I usually choose EMS, it's my preferred way of shipping that's for sure ^o^

  20. I don’t usually go for games like this, but this game was strangely addicting. I played it in 3 days, with only 3 hours a sleep/night.It’s just as you said “its a trainwreck but you just can’t look away!”.

    I love the fact how you had to first play Ayato, Laito or Kanato to unlock Shuu, Subarun or Reiji. It’s like you have to go through hell first before you get to the paradise.

    THE FREAKING DUMMY HEAD MIC… OMFG they nailed it. I almost rolled out of my bed and threw my headphones to the wall when Toriumi hurhurhured my ears (/ω\) (*ノωノ)

    Anyways, thank you for the review! Funny and good as always =)

    • I didn’t find Kanato’s route to be THAT awful compared to Ayato & Laito and after doing Kanato everyone else unlocked so I guess you didn’t necessarily have to do all the triplets at once xD;; (Though its good to get the crazy ones out of the way first probably)

      Toriumi was sexy indeed ;DDD He was the most eroi one. Well Laito was good too but since he was so kimoi the kimoiness took over the sexyness for me (|||❛︵❛.)

      • Well I wouldn’t call Kanato’s route hell either (even if I just did…). XD He isn’t that bad. First time in my life I actually enjoyed a crazy shota who likes to stab me with a fork lol. And Kaji did a really good job voicing him. Props to him.

        Yeah, Laito… He was actually one of my favorites before the game came out. The whole thing with boinking his own mother and being kimoi just killed him for me. Though Hirakawa’s moaning made his route bit more enjoyable haha :’DD

  21. I still have exams and haven’t proper finished anyone yet but couldn’t resist reading your review but fucking seriously? I thought they’d give Reiji a better back story than a badly explained inferiority complex. I don’t know, surely you’d need more of a reason to kill your mother than she loved nii-san more or some shit I though they’d be like no their ma was a total bipolar nut-job and beat the shit out of them when they were younger or just like something to better justify how fucked up he is ’cause from what I’ve seen she didn’t actually do anything that would merit getting fucked over that badly? I don’t fucking know right now I need to go back to these exams and this is bad like I was looking forward to his of all routes ;_; FD pls. Btw he’s like 10x more terrifying in the 3rd versus what just came out, like in his CD it was kinda of ‘hahaha nice try’ but in versus it was ‘holy fucking shit get away from me now’, by far the most terrifying out of all the versus’, if you’re into the CD’s as well check that out. Anyway, back to exams now, thanks so much for the hard work as always Hinano (´ ▽`).。o♡

    • yeaa I woulda forgiven Reiji’s douchery if he had a reason for it…but he didn’t lol. Oh Rejet.

      yea Beatrix seemed pretty normal to me…she was just always harassed by Cordelia for stealing her dicks desuwa.

      I didn’t listen to the 1st or 3rd vs CDs…I’m starting to feel like they’re almost so different from the game (except like Subaru) that I think I’ll stick to the game as my “canon” xD

  22. Whoever wrote this revew of the game – Please kill yourself.

    • What the actual fuck? Some people takes things way to far holy! ಠ_ಠ From this to those condescending comments on domshiki’s sorta review/impression post about the game, I just don’t get why people get so worked up over a game and actively seek out and comment on reviews they don’t agree with just to say disgusting shit like this??? I just don’t get it idk

      Anyway, I liked the review because it was funny and informative. I don’t go to reviews looking for concise summaries, I prefer reading what people think and their opinions and even if you don’t agree with a reviewer there’s no one holding a gun to your head saying you HAVE to comment lol. Some people…

  23. Lemme just cry forever

    Omg reading this review scared me so bad ;_; why did i become interested in this game in the first place orz oh right it was because of the fancy artwork ;______;

  24. ^^^^^ There are actually some points in your review where I disagree, and it’s kind of normal because everyone isn’t you & vice-versa but I think that this comment(like Katya’s one) is pushing it a little too far? If she disagrees that much I at least would expect some argumentation or smt but oh well….

    Anyway I’m glad you liked Shuu! He’s my bias so it’s good to see that people are loving him lol I also liked Subaru a lot but I felt that something was missing… Or maybe I expected something crazier since his route was the otome-ish-est among all? I don’t really know why but… ye. OTL
    And Kanato’s normal ED made me tableflip all the tables around the world I just couldn’t stand it ow my poor babies;;;;

    I need a FD, I need some Toriumi vampire “pr0n” in my ears again.
    ’till then~ :3

    • its ok haters gonna hate lol
      Yes Subaru was quite the otome but that’s what I like so…also while Shuu is eroi, Subaru is a tsundere and I am so weak to dem tsunderes… (*´▽`*)
      id love a fandisk maybe we’ll get one? maybe not who knows.

  25. Haha this was great, loved the review, you’re pretty fucking funny (> v <) ~ <3

    Just wish I could read Japanese, i'll always get the otome games anyway but then I'll immediately regret it because I can only understand like every 8 words. Yay me right?
    Lol it's like "What are ________ going _____ apples _______ tonight____ here____see ya."
    Oh well… Maybe in like 5-8 years I'll be able to understand most of it (´Д`)

    • glad you liked it!
      if you do study it enough eventually one day you’ll wake up and be like “oh snap I can undestand most of whats being said!” At least that’s how it was for me (though it was like a 6-10 year process xD).

  26. FFFFFFFFF- Hinano, you’re my favorite otome reviewer. You’re fucking hilarious. I love you and marry me please. xDD Anyway, think I’ll get this game now. :D Can’t wait to play Subaru’s route. Ufufu~ Tsundere. yes. yes.

  27. I saw this link on my friend’s Plurk. Needless to say, I’ve never played any Otome game because I’m the type of fangirl who prefers Yaoi/Hentai games instead. But for some reason, I was so bored and decided to read your entire review, no regrets lol. Laughed my ass out at some points. This makes me want to play this game.

    Oh wait, I dunno Wapanese ;__;

    • Haha well hey if you’re ever curious feel free to read my reviews :P Though how do you play the yaoi games without knowing Japanese? AGTH?

  28. Reblogged this on Fish and Chips Makes a Blog and commented:
    Diabolik Lovers game review….this game is the shizz! and not in the good way, too!

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